Incident at Victoria Falls

Sherlock Holmes:
Watson, I think you should perform a post-mortem on this woman.

Dr. John Watson:
Good God, Holmes, she was ripped apart by crocodiles!

Amelia Roosevelt Morrison:
[about her autograph book] Pablo Picaso drew me a little picture, but I couldn't make it out, so I threw it away.

Dr. John Watson:
Which means?

Sherlock Holmes:
Son of pig.

Dr. John Watson:
Really? I wouldn't expect a lady of any caste to say such a thing.

Dr. John Watson:
Are you absolutely sure it will be tonight, Holmes? It's almost tomorrow.

Sherlock Holmes:
I have been wrong on three occasions, Watson, who can tell, this might be the fourth.

Inspector Lestrade:
It appears that Signor Marconi and his wife are on holiday, on their way to America.

Dr. John Watson:
On that brand new vessel, the Titanic, I should imagine.

Inspector Lestrade:
No, no, the maiden voyage was delayed, so they had to change to another vessel.

Dr. John Watson:
Rotten luck.

Dr. John Watson:
Well I never. So you had the real stone all the time, and the tieves had the fake one. Could that be true?

Sherlock Holmes:
When you write the story, Watson, you decide.