Bite Marks

Cary:
Why don't they just break through the window?

Vogel:
Zombies are too weak.

Cary:
They're not zombies. Zombies don't run.

Vogel:
What about in Dawn of the Dead?

Cary:
The zombies didn't run in Dawn of the Dead.

Vogel:
The remake.

Cary:
Phfft! The remake!

Vogel:
I know... the original had subtext. You know what else the original had? Blue zombies! You have to admit, the first ten minutes of the remake were...

Cary:
Hey, how much did you pay to see the remake? Twelve bucks? Kind of expensive for ten good minutes, huh?

Cary:
They're vampires!

Vogel:
Or atheists!

Cary:
Careful, it's slippery.

Vogel:
It's like the back room at the ManCave in here. Remember that?

Cary:
That wasn't me.

Vogel:
C'mon, toothy! Take a bite! Who's your dentist!

Cary:
There're two guys back at the truck! Eat THEM!

Waitress:
Coffins? A coffin? Are you nuts? What would I do with a coffin?

Brewster:
Hey, we all need one eventually, darlin'.

Waitress:
Not me. I'm gonna be cremated and have my ashes mailed to Val Kilmer.

McDougall:
You want some coffee?

Brewster:
Yeah... and a bathroom. I've had to pee since dinner.

McDougall:
Well, you're in luck. Best thing about being a man is, whole world's your toilet. Why, out there, there're a hundred places you can drain the tank and look at metal twisted into shapes you never dreamed of. It's like... it's like pissin' in an art museum.

Brewster:
I'm gonna call a mechanic. I'll be right back. Don't jizz on anythin'.

Vogel:
That's a really photographic pile of junk, Cary.

Cary:
I suppose you'd like it better if it wore a speedo.

Vogel:
Everything looks better in a speedo.

Vogel:
C'mon, fanghead! I'm juicy!