Born to Be Mild Starring Rita Rudner

Rita Rudner:
What is cream of tartar? I hope it's not what I think it is.

Rita Rudner:
My dad refuses to buy new clothes until he loses the weight, so he still sits around in his cub scout uniform.

Rita Rudner:
I've spent many sleepless nights worried about baking soda. It puts out fire, you can brush your teeth with it, it's a deodorant, is it Sybil?

Rita Rudner:
My husband tried to discourage me from buying a dress. I told him I wanted it, he said 'okay, go ahead, it looks like something my old girlfriend would've liked.' I bought it so she couldn't have it.

Rita Rudner:
I got a slow cooker and I'm cooking a dinner for the year 2000.