Caddyshack II

Chandler Young:
I'm Chandler Young.

Jack Hartounian:
Oh, I'm afraid I'm at a disadvantage; I only have one last name.

Chandler Young:
And quite an interesting last name it is.

Jack Hartounian:
Hartounian!

Chandler Young:
What is your background?

Jack Hartounian:
My father was Armenian. My other was half Jewish, half English, half Spanish.

Chandler Young:
That's three halves.

Jack Hartounian:
Oh, she was a big woman.

Chandler Young:
Interesting club. what would you call that?

Jack Hartounian:
Twelve gauge.

Peter Blunt:
Golf, golf... what kinda name is "golf" anyway? Sounds like a sound you make when you've got something caught in your throat.

Chandler Young:
Your target's name is Jack Hartounian. I want him to be discouraged from erecting any more structures on Bushwood estates.

Capt. Tom Everett:
Discouraged? As in "extreme prejudice"?

Chandler Young:
We already tried extreme prejudice. It didn't work.

Capt. Tom Everett:
No, I mean do you want him... Everett pulls out a gun.

Capt. Tom Everett:
...terminated?

Chandler Young:
The less I know about that, the better.

Capt. Tom Everett:
Good! Good, that's my policy exactly. You see, that way, when we're captured, and they attach the twelve-volt car batteries to our testicles... which can, does, and... has happened...

Capt. Tom Everett:
...then we can honestly say we had nothing to do with it.

Cynthia Young:
I want to go home.

Chandler Young:
Now now, Cynthia. The last thing we want to do is let him think he's winning.

Cynthia Young:
But he IS winning!