Carmen Sandiego's Great Chase Through Time

Ann Tikwittee:
Oh, look at the furry guinea pig! Cute little guy! What do you call it?

Pachacuti Yupanqui:
Dinner! That's a cui, of course. With a little corn and plenty of salt, they are most tasty!

Ann Tikwittee:
Eeeeeeeeew! Sorry I asked!

Pachacuti Yupanqui:
I'm the greatest Inca leader ever!

Lord:
That peasant is being punished for stealing a chicken. He must spend one full day locked in the stockades, while people toss rotten vegetables at him.

Polly Tix:
No vegetarians here. Upper class Normans thought vegetables were fit only for peasants, so they didn't eat many. That excuse never worked with my mother!

Ann Tikwittee:
What do you keep in these jars?

Head Priest:
Those are royal canopic jars, where King Thutmose's liver, lungs, stomach, and intestines are quietly resting.

Ann Tikwittee:
Ugh! Sorry I asked.

Old Man in Bath:
Puteo! That latrine looks backed up. The smell alone could overpower a fierce enemy!

Ivan Idea:
So, hey, where do you guys keep the toilet paper?

Old Man in Bath:
Oh, paper is much too rare and expensive to be used in that manner. We prefer sponges attached to sticks.

The Chief:
What's a Chronoskimmer? The only time travel device on the planet, that's all.

Richard Burbage:
[rehearsing "Hamlet"] Two beans, or not two beans! That is indigestion!

The Chief:
No donuts 'til you catch Carmen.

Mona Lisa:
[Renee is trying to get Mona to smile] I am NOT amused.

Renee Santz:
Well, how about a joke: How many ACME agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Mona Lisa:
What's a "light bulb"?

Renee Santz:
Uh... never mind.

Old Man in Bath:
[the player and Ivan have pumped sewage into the old man's bath, who reacts with shock] What happened down there? This bathwater is vile and... smells like a country barnyard! Phoooooooweeeee!

Ivan Idea:
...Well, we got some water running!

William the Conquerer:
This cauldron is used to keep those pesky Saxons from raiding my castle walls, sometimes it is filled with hot water or oil; which sticks to the enemy's skin.

Polly Tix:
Sticks to the skin? Eugh!

William the Conquerer:
Catapults are great weapons not just for throwing stones but also dead animals, which spread disease.

Polly Tix:
Grossola!