Disney

[the first two pigs notice Practical Pig building a lie detector, then laugh]

Fifer Pig:
He's building another wolf machine. He must be crazy in the beans.

Fiddler Pig':
To work all day is fun for him, but not for us. Let's take a swim!

Practical Pig:
Don't go swimming, do ya hear?! The pond ain't safe; the wolf is near!

[a hammer piece falls on his head, then the two pigs laugh]

Fifer and Fiddler Pig:
[singing] He's afraid of the Big Bad Wolf! [they make razzling and whistling noises]

[the Big Bad Wolf is caught in the Practical Pig's lie detector machine]

Practical Pig:
Where are my brothers?!

Big Bad Wolf:
Your brothers?! Never heard of 'em!

[the lie detector detects a lie, then washes the Big Bad Wolf's with soap and water]

Practical Pig:
Where are my brothers?!

Big Bad Wolf:
I never had seen 'em!

[the lie detector detects another lie, then spanks the wolf in the rear]

Practical Pig:
Where are my brothers?!

Big Bad Wolf:
I never had...I mean...look. [looks at lie detector, then looks at Practical Pig and speaks in a calmer voice] Now, listen, buddy. You've got me wrong. Why, I'm your pal.

[the lie detector detects still another lie and punishes the wolf once more]

Fiddler and Fifer Pig:
Why don't you mind your Papa?!

Practical Pig:
Didn't I tell you not to go swimming?

Fifer Pig:
Oh, we didn't go swimming, did we?

Fiddler Pig:
Oh, no.

[the lie detector detects a lie and spanks the two pigs]

Practical Pig:
Remember, this hurts me worse than it does to you!

[the lie detector sounds again and spanks Practical]

[the wolves are about to bake the two pigs]

Fifer and Fiddler Pig:
You'll be sorry when your pop gets back and we ain't here.

Three Little Wolves:
Ha! We'll be sorry!

Fiddler and Fifer Pig:
The wolf! He's got her!

[Practical Pig packs up and rushes down to the house]

Fiddler and Fifer Pig:
You'll get there, quick, Red Riding Hood, if you take the shortcut, through the woods.

Practical Pig:
There's danger in them woods! Be aware! The Big Bad Wolf is lurking, there!

[all notice Practical Pig]

Practical Pig:
Better do, be safe and sorry! Shortcuts are not always good. Take the long road around the corners, while the wolf is in the woods.

Big Bad Wolf:
Open the door and let me in!

Fifer:
Not by the hair on my chinny chin chin!

Big Bad Wolf:
I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house in!

Fifer and Fiddler Pig:
Who's there?

Big Bad Wolf:
[disguised as a sheep] I'm a poor little sheep, with no place to sleep. Please open the door and let me in.

Fifer and Fiddler Pig:
Not by the hair on our chinny chin chin! You can't fool us with that old sheepskin!

Big Bad Wolf:
I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house in!

Practical Pig:
Who's there?

Big Bad Wolf:
[disguised as a fuller brush man] I'm a fuller brush man. I worked my way through college. [hands Practical Pig a brush]

Practical Pig:
Thank you.

Big Bad Wolf:
[tries to grab Practical Pig] Now, I've got you, you little...

[Practical Pig hits the Wolf on his foot, then on the head with the brush, then pulls his doormat off of under him, and finally throws the brush at him]

Big Bad Wolf:
By the hair on your chinny chin chin, I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house in!

Practical Pig:
The wolf!