East Side of Heaven

Nicky:
[Entering the nightclub] Ah, sad music! - like Russian. Now, I can be depressed while I eat.

Denny Martin:
Say, Mr. Bennett, could I speak to you for a minute? Now you can stop me if you've heard this.

Cyrus Barrett Jr.:
[Happily anticipating] Oh, you've got a new story?

Denny Martin:
No. Oh, no. It's an old story, and you've probably heard it before... but here's how it goes... most scientists agree that one of the few things that can't be preserved in alcohol is a happy home.

Mary Wilson:
[Referring to De Wolfe] Denny, please don't be upset by what he said.

Denny Martin:
Oh, I'm not upset.

Mary Wilson:
Every knock's a boost, you know.

Denny Martin:
[Dejectedly] Yeah, I know.

Mary Wilson:
And it doesn't matter what anyone says about you as long as they spell your name right.

Denny Martin:
[Referring to the baby's safety] Are you daffy? Supposing he fell on his head or something?

Nicky:
That's nothing! I fell on my head twice when I was a baby.

Denny Martin:
[Sarcastically] Yeah? Well once is enough.

Denny Martin:
[after being requested to sing] Now, Mrs. Kelly, I park my voice when I park my cab.

Denny Martin:
Sometimes I feel like a cross between a nightengale and a carrier pigeon.

Claudius De Wolfe:
And a wiser man than I once said: love is intoxication, marriage the headache, and divorce the spirin tablet. [He chuckles]