Force 10 from Navarone

Jensen:
We're tacking you onto Force 10. The code name for an operation for the Allied mission in Yugoslavia.

Mallory:
Excuse me, sir. What's their objective?

Jensen:
It's being treated on a need-to-know basis. And you don't need to know.

Jensen:
[Handing Miller and Mallory a photograph] I'm afraid it's not exactly a masterpiece... but I wonder if you can identify this fellow. [sees no sign that they recognize anyone in the picture] Think back to Navarone.

Miller:
I'd rather not, sir.

Jensen:
Nicolai? Yes. Let you down a bit, didn't he?

Mallory:
But what about him? Andrea's people had him shot as a traitor, didn't they?

Jensen:
Yes, so we were told. In fact, he escaped. He wasn't a traitor. He was a German agent, who we believe is operating now in Yugoslavia with the Partisans, posing as one Captain Lescovar. Now, you both knew Nicolai. In fact, you're the only people we know of can make a positive identification. So I'd like you to go out there and cope.

Miller:
Cope, sir?

Mallory:
Kill him.

Maj. Schroeder:
Ah, tell me what has all this to do with that, uh, suitcase case you keep looking at?

Mallory:
Well, that suitcase is full of our penicillin.

Maj. Schroeder:
Oh, indeed. Perhaps I could see some of it?

Mallory:
Certainly, Major. Open it Miller.

Miller:
You can't do that here, sir. You'll ruin the lot. You know perfectly well that any contamination will destroy it. It's got to be opened under laboratory conditions.

Barnsby:
Sorry about Marko.

Lescovar:
Thank you. It's a risk we all take. He was a brave man and a good friend. Then he got careless.

Mallory:
You think that big sergeant spotted him as a partisan?

Barnsby:
I can't buy that. The sergeant wasn't that bright. [to Lescovar] He saluted you - you're wearing a corporal's uniform. That doesn't rate a salute in the German army.

Mallory:
Not in anybody's army. Why do you think he saluted you, Lescovar?

Lescovar:
Perhaps he recognized my natural superiority.

Mallory:
Yes, perhaps.

Mallory:
Next time, you can play the corpse. You seem pretty handy with that thing, though.

Barnsby:
Could've been luck.

Weaver:
[handed a pile of what looks suspiciously like dog poo] Now what the hell am I supposed to do with this?

Miller:
Oh, I don't know. Try and imagine you're a dog. Oh for heaven's sake! On the road, man, on the road!

Weaver:
[grumbling to himself] I thought you were supposed to pick up dog sh*t, not spread it around.

Mallory:
[thoughtfully] Miller, what would happen to the bridge if that central arch were suddenly hit by several million tons of water?

Miller, Barnsby:
Water?

Mallory:
I think we've been talking about the wrong target. Remember that dam we passed by on the way up here?

Miller:
[suddenly all ears] Dam? What sort of dam?

Barnsby:
It's just up the road, about half a mile that way.

Miller:
Well, my dear chap, why didn't you say so before? Oh, I could do a tremendous job on the dam! See, with the dam, you've got your natural elements working for you. It's like having an enormous bath - what have you got to do? Pull the plug!

Mallory:
May I talk to you personally, sir?

Maj. Petrovitch:
You are talking to me personally.

Mallory:
No, I mean alone.

Maj. Petrovitch:
No. The People's army does not conduct military business in secret.

Mallory:
[with Lescovar standing next to Major Petrovitch] I was sent here to identify a German agent, code name "Nicolai." We are reliably informed that he has infiltrated the People's Resistance Army, and is now known as Capt. Lescovar.

Maj. Petrovitch:
And having identified this man, what were your further orders?

Mallory:
I was to eliminate him, sir.

Maj. Petrovitch:
Eliminate? Don't you mean kill?

Mallory:
Yes, sir. I do mean kill.

Maj. Petrovitch:
[to Lescovar] Do you hear that, Lescovar? The gentlemen from London want us to shoot you. [Bursts out laughing] I'm sorry, major. I must admit you are indeed partly right. There was an agent named Nicolai... operating somewhere south of here and also calling himself Lescovar. But he was identified many months ago. And eliminated. The British were informed.

Mallory:
But London were very specific, sir

Maj. Petrovitch:
Yes, they frequently are specific... and just as frequently wrong! [to Marko] Lt. Marko, see that these gentlemen... give you a full report on their activities in the Chetnik camp. A specific report.

Barnsby:
What happened to you?

Weaver:
He bit me in all the excitement. But damn it to hell, we did it, Colonel! We did it!

Barnsby:
Yes we did, Sergeant! Yes we did!

Miller:
And a merry Christmas!

Mallory:
Yes, gentlemen, we did it! [chuckling] But before we can start awarding ourselves Victoria Crosses and Congressional Medals of Honor and so on and so forth and such like... I think I'd better point out that one, we're now on the wrong side of the river. That two, we have no hope whatsoever of rejoining the partisans. That three, this neck of the woods will soon be crawling with very bad-tempered Germans. And that four, I don't think our little genius Sergeant Miller there has even got a box of matches left in his suitcase. And so I think we can take it, gentlemen, that we're going to have a very long walk home.

Barnsby:
Now, look. Our experts have been studying that bridge for weeks, and they say it'll blow. I don't know where you learned your job, but I'm talking about the best construction engineers in the business!

Miller:
Yes. Well, they're probably experts at building things, whereas I'm an expert at blowing them up, and you can take it from me that one would need a good eight hours to make a decent job on that bridge.

Mallory:
I don't suppose they taught you German at that awful school of yours?

Miller:
What, instead of Latin? Heaven forbid, old boy.

S/Sgt. John Miller:
Don't worry, old chap. Been handling this stuff ever since I blew up the nursery with my first chemistry set. Poor old Nanny.