Free Spirit

Melissa Simpson:
Edgar loved to laugh... he loved to breathe too. But at the end, he had to make a choice!

Melissa Simpson:
Oh, Thomas, you're such a loyal friend. I can't understand why everyone says lawyers are such scum!

Robb Harper:
Gene's using his video camera to make me look ridiculous.

Winnie Goodwinn:
Since when does he need a camera to do that?

Thomas J. Harper:
We're staying in separate rooms, of course.

Melissa Simpson:
Actually, they're adjoining rooms. You know, in case we find it necessary to...

Winnie Goodwinn:
Adjoin?

Melissa Simpson:
Thomas, my sources indicate the woman doesn't exist. She has no credit rating, no social security number... no voter registration!

Thomas J. Harper:
So she didn't vote in the last election -- look who was running!

Thomas J. Harper:
Really, Winnie! The woman is still in mourning.

Winnie Goodwinn:
I guess that explains the black bra.

Winnie Goodwinn:
So Melissa, what would you like for dinner?

Melissa Simpson:
Oh, I'm easy.

Winnie Goodwinn:
I know!

Winnie Goodwinn:
Oh, she is such a phony!

Jessie Harper:
Why can't Dad just see through her?

Robb Harper:
Trust me, he's trying!

Melissa Simpson:
Thomas, can I be frank?

Thomas J. Harper:
Please.

Melissa Simpson:
You're very attractive...

Thomas J. Harper:
Oh, thank you.

Melissa Simpson:
But I hate the way you dress. Edgar was buried in a snappier jacket!

Thomas J. Harper:
Melissa, I'm speechless.

Melissa Simpson:
Good. Then I won't have to listen to anymore of your stupid jokes!

Thomas J. Harper:
You laughed at my jokes.

Melissa Simpson:
Hey, I cried at Edgar's funeral!

Gene Harper:
Robb, that movie has an "R" rating.

Winnie Goodwinn:
What does that mean? What's a rating?

Robb Harper:
Aw, um, well... You see, they have this whole system for rating movies. Uh, like a "G" means "good." Uh, "PG" stands for, um...

Gene Harper:
"Particularly good."

Robb Harper:
Yeah. Uh, "R" means "really good" and "X" rated, of course, means "excellent."

Winnie Goodwinn:
That's really helpful! But why go see a "really good" movie when we could see one that's "excellent?"

Robb Harper:
Why didn't I think of that?

Jessie Harper:
Daddy, do you have any idea what your son, the pig, did at school today? He told Jerry Kendall I used to be a Siamese twin!

Robb Harper:
I said it was just a rumor.

Jessie Harper:
Rumor? Two girls in gym asked to see my scar!