Funny Valentines

Dearie B.:
Troy Watts! Bring your narrow a** outta there!

Troy Watts:
[Comes out chuckling] I ain't nothing to say to you. [Turns to leave]

Dearie B.:
You get back here, or else I'll come in after you!

Troy Watts:
What you want, retard?

Dearie B.:
You hurt me once, but you ain't gonna hurt me again! You stay away from my family! [Moving closer] You're nothing. You never were nothing, and you're never gonna be nothing, because you're empty in your heart! Now, it took me a long time to figure it out, but I know you tried to ruin my life when I was younger, but my life is BIGGER than YOU!

Troy Watts:
Don't you be loud-talking me because you too stupid to close your legs!

Dearie B.:
You were born to a minister. Ain't you figured out nothing yet! YOU'RE the real dummy! Like a dog gnawing on a bone with no teeth! You're godless! You stay AWAY from my family! You stay away from ME.

Dearie B.:
[to Joyce] Everyone always said you and I were like peanut butter and jelly.

Joyce May:
Dearie , you know how you always said you wished we were sisters?

Dearie B.:
Mmm-hmm.

Joyce May:
Well, we are.

Dearie B.:
Uh-huh.

Joyce May:
No, we are! Blood sisters. I saw the birth certificate.

Dearie B.:
Oh, Joyce May, I know!

Joyce May:
How... how do you know?

Dearie B.:
Because I wished it!

Joyce May:
Dearie, it's not that simple.

Dearie B.:
Of course it is. You don't need a piece of paper to tell you what's already in your heart. Even I know that.

Joyce May:
Now, I remember something I once read. Of all the treasures in the world, there is nothing more precious than giving someone a piece of your heart.