Hellcats

Savannah Monroe:
[Repeated line] Positive outcomes only.

Marti Perkins:
Poor Dan Patch. Here you are, finally dating a cheerleader and she won't let you under her skirt.

Dan Patch:
I have the same problem with Scottish bagpipe players.

Savannah Monroe:
Hell to the yes! Whoo!

Jake Harrow:
Lewis, what is your new job called? Is it catcher? Base? Bottom b*tch? Do you go by bottom b*tch?

Morgan Pepper:
You look terrible.

Marti Perkins:
Wow. Thanks. I didn't sleep well. I had roommate trouble.

Morgan Pepper:
Hmm, cheerleaders. Can't live with them, can't bury them in shallow, unmarked graves... Unless you have the right lawyer.

Marti Perkins:
[Deadpan] Ha ha.

Morgan Pepper:
Well, there's obviously no cheering you up today.

Lewis Flynn:
[to his father] You were the one that told me to guard your principles jealously, because at the end of the day that's all a man has.

Alice Verdura:
Why do you have to provoke Lewis? You know he doesn't matter to me anymore.

Jake Harrow:
Honestly, I can't help it. They guy is so full of himself. "Alright Hellcats, now trust in your teammates and focus! Come game time, we're gonna make those volleyball girls feel some pain!"

Alice Verdura:
[Chuckles] Whatever. By the way, thanks for coming to my practice. Did you see I'm the QB?

Jake Harrow:
I did. That's my girl. Congrats.

[They kiss]

Jake Harrow:
And you know what's the best part of beating the pants off ya? Easy access later.

Alice Verdura:
What are you talking about?

Jake Harrow:
I'm coaching the volleyball girls.

Alice Verdura:
You're helping the other team?

Jake Harrow:
Yeah, one of their setters writes term papers for me, so I kinda owe her one.

Alice Verdura:
[Scoffs] No way! Tell them you quit!

Jake Harrow:
Calm down. It's a stupid flag football game. Who cares?

Alice Verdura:
I care. I want this campus to sit up and take notice that we are athletes. To do that, we have to win.

Jake Harrow:
Yeah... no one on campus cares about this game except you guys. So, just listen, play ball, have some fun and take your lumps. By the way, you're gonna look really hot out there in your shorts.

[Jakes goes in for a kiss, but Alice diverts her face]

Alice Verdura:
Sugar train has left the station.

Jake Harrow:
Alice...

Alice Verdura:
If you're not with us, you're not with me!

Jake Harrow:
Oh! Fine. That goes both ways. So, as of this moment Alice, you are officially banned from my pants.

Alice Verdura:
What ever will I do to while away the nights? I'm thinking negligee tickle fights.

Jake Harrow:
[Beat] You'll need a camera for that?

Alice Verdura:
[to Marti] If you're determined to put a bullet in the Hellcats, I'm going to make you look us in the eye when you pull the trigger.

Frankie:
Getting abducted was my favorite part of initiation night.

Lewis Flynn:
You might want to consider therapy for that.

[about the Hellcats' spirit staff]

Savannah Monroe:
If you drop that, it's a bad omen.

Marti Perkins:
Do we get six more weeks of winter?

Vanessa Lodge:
Please forgive Alice. She was raised by wolves.

Alice Verdura:
[to Savannah] If you expect your boyfriend to bid on you, you oughta think about spicing up your date plan. Guys can only go on so many picnics before they want breakfast in bed.

Dan Patch:
[to Alice] Like you've ever had a guy stick around for breakfast.

[after Dan's ideas fail to inspire the Hellcats]

Marti Perkins:
Oh, Yoko.

Wanda Perkins:
Men have two brains. Unfortunately they only have enough blood to use one of them at a time, which is where all the problems pop-up.