Incident at Loch Ness

Kitana Baker:
Zak, why exactly am I wearing a g-string bikini?

Zak Penn:
Because you are a model and you're a sonar operator.

Zak Penn:
I don't want to make some sort of blanket comment about the people of Scotland, but the fact that they picked on Michael Karnow, of all people, I think is pretty low. I mean, this is a guy who wouldn't hurt a fly. Literally. I mean, he literally has a thing about flies. He will not hurt flies.

Zak Penn:
When I look back, and I hear people talk about what suffering, I say to myself, "Who suffered more than I did"? I mean, other than the people who died. I mean, obviously, they suffered more because, well, they're dead. But, you could make the argument that they're dead, so they're not really dealing with it, whereas I live with the guilt, and I live with the sadness.

Zak Penn:
At least we're not dragging the boat over a hill...

Werner Herzog:
What was that?

Zak Penn:
Uh... nothing.

Werner Herzog:
I couldn't believe Zak stole the lifeboat. I had only one thought on my mind: if I survive this, I was gonna find Zak Penn, and I would hunt him down, and I would strangle him with my two hands.

Michael Karnow:
[on the topic of the Loch Ness Monster being fiction or real] They say show me the evidence. I say show me the non-evidence.

Zak Penn:
Yes, I named the boat Discovery 4. That was my idea. I thought it sounded cool. It was very important to me to build a credible expedition, that's why I had the jumpsuits, that's why I had that sonar. I wanted people to think and to feel like this was an authentic expedition to find the Loch Ness Monster. Jacques Cousteau didn't go out in a boat called, you know, the Tweety Bird. You know, it had some cool name, I don't know what it was, but I'm sure it was cool. And... Discovery 4. You know, Discovery 4. I don't know, to me it worked.

Werner Herzog:
A lot of strange things happened the first day on the boat. And it looked like a confusing puzzle to me while I was working there. But at the end of the day, somehow everything fell into place, and I knew, I just knew that there was something seriously wrong.

Kitana Baker:
Zak was very insistent that I explain the sonar equipment.

Zak Penn:
I had actually gotten this equipment through connections I had to Jim Cameron's company.

Kitana Baker:
Under the impression that I was there to play the 'role' of a sonar operator, I had done some research ahead of time.

Zak Penn:
It was really authentic looking. I mean Jacques Cousteau would've given his left nut for this thing, and I just wanted to get some shots of it on screen. And you think, whatever, no big deal, it'll take like two seconds. But it was like pulling teeth.