Judging Amy

Interior Decorator:
Usually I'm so perceptive of people. Come on... what's changed?

Maxine:
Two weeks ago my fianc?e died of a heart attack 48 hours before we were to be wed. Also, I've cut my hair.

Board Member:
We're a little concerned that your director is a drug addict.

Maxine Gray:
No, my director is a former drug addict. I myself am a former high school student, and everyone here used to poop in your pants. What's your point?

Maxine Gray:
Never wear fire for a hat... I haven't any idea what it means. I read it in a bathroom stall once and it stuck with me.

Maxine:
By the way, I'm getting married a week from Saturday. I expect you to be there.

Sean Potter:
A week from Saturday? Maxine, why are you getting married a week from Saturday?

Maxine:
So I can have sex, Sean. Why else would anyone get married?

Amy Gray:
The only way we do better is by figuring out what we did wrong.

Maxine Gray:
[Amy has been in bed with the flu for several days] Amy? I brought you some chicken soup. How do you feel?

Amy Gray:
Horrible. I've been seeing things. It's like being on acid.

[notices the look on Maxine's face]

Amy Gray:
If I'd ever done acid.

Amy Gray:
[after being shouted out, Maxine rushes into the kitchen] Mom, are you OK?

Maxine Gray:
[trying not to laugh] Of course, but I am 65 years old, and my boyfriend's mother hates me

Maxine:
Men look in the mirror just as much as women do. They just conclude they always look great.

Lauen Cassidy:
What's anorexia?

Maxine:
It's a disease women get by reading magazines.

Maxine:
He's my therapist, Sean, you wanted me to go to therapy, I'm going to therapy; are you happy now? Why don't we just shout it to the world? MAXINE GRAY IS IN THERAPY!

Sean Potter:
[turns to walk away] And not a moment to soon...

Maxine Gray:
[to Peter] I'm your mother, I love you unconditionally. Even if you wear that tie with that shirt.

Ignacio Messina:
Really, I think people just stop trying.

Vincent Gray:
Is that what's going on with my mom?

Ignacio Messina:
Your mother's at that point.

Vincent Gray:
What is that?

Ignacio Messina:
Where pain of the past meets fear of the future. It's where most fighters give up.

Lorna Thompson:
SHUT! UP! Marsha is dead. Do you understand that?

Shelly Cecil:
Oh. So that's why she's not answering my emails.

Oliver Cecil:
Shelly!

Shelly Cecil:
Of course I understand. I killed my best friend! I saw her lying there. My life is over! I can't go back to school, I can't even walk down the street. I'm a murderer! So do what ever you want with me, okay? Put me in jail for the rest of my life. Make her happy because it's all over; I'm already dead!

Amy Gray:
Miss Cecil; Shelly. Look at me. Okay, okay, then just listen to me. We're going to get through this, all of us.

Oliver Cecil:
[Whispered] We'll get through this, okay?

Amy Gray:
It's not over.

Shelly Cecil:
[laughs] Well, Marsha said this really funny thing right before we crashed. She said, "How'd you get to be such a good driver, Shelle?" Got to admit that's funny. [laughs again]

Sean Potter:
Don't take this the wrong way, but you're crazy.

Maxine:
Well, that's irrelevant.

Vincent Gray:
When I create my own universe, people are gonna grow and learn by eating ice cream and having lots of sex.

Maxine Gray:
Baby's boats a silver moon / Sailing in the sky / Sailing over a sea of sleep / While the clouds roll by / Sail baby sail / Out upon that sea / Only don't forget to sail / Back again to me / Baby's fishing for a dream / Fishing near and far / His line a silver moonbeam is / His bait a silver star / Sail baby sail / Out upon that sea / Only don't forget to sail / Back again to me

Donna Kozlowski:
Some people believe that before we're born, when we're still in spirit form, we make a deal with the universe... choose the families we're born into. We have different reasons, based on the lessons we need to learn. I'm not sure what I was thinking when I chose mine. But, it's obvious why Judge Gray chose hers. I'm just really glad I could be a part of it. God bless us... every one.

Maxine:
Amen

Maxine:
If wisdom doesn't come with age, then why bother getting old?

Amy Gray:
Did anybody call while I was in the shower?

Maxine:
A telemarketer. I spoke French to him and he hung up.

Amy Gray:
You don't speak French.

Maxine:
I speak phony-French fluently.

Amy Gray:
Do you ever worry that you're becoming the kind of person who isn't worth the fight?

Maxine:
No, I don't worry about that. I feel that my only job in life is to be who I am.