La gran aventura de Mortadelo y Filemón

Mortadelo:
Don't thank me, Chief. Just give me a Christmas bonus.

Filem?n P?:
Didn't I send you a turkey last year?

Mortadelo:
Sure. 1/4 pound of sliced spam.

Mortadelo:
What a drag, isn't it?

Filem?n P?:
It's the Super, Mortadelo. He probably wants to tell us something.

Mortadelo:
What could he want so early, Chief?

Amena (voice):
This is AT & T free information service. Go to T.I.A.G.H.Q. if you want to keep your nuts intact.

Filem?n P?:
But he wanted us at 6 A.M., i.e. After Midday, and it's only 11 in the morning! For God's sake!

Ofelia:
What are you doing?

Filem?n P?:
Deciding who's taking you out to dinner, Ofelia.

Ofelia:
Don't cry, Mr. Filem?n. You can take me out some other time.

Mortadelo:
No, that's why he's crying. The loser takes the cow out to pasture.

Filem?n P?:
I'm available, darling.

La Amiga de Mentxu la madre de Filem?n:
With that mug, I'm not surprised.

Calimero, el Tirano:
The Red Phone. See what I mean? Hello?

Nadiusko, esp?a ruso:
Calimero?

Calimero, el Tirano:
Excuse me?

Nadiusko, esp?a ruso:
I want to speak with Calimero.

Calimero, el Tirano:
A homosexual communist. And he knows my first name!

Mortadelo:
Forget it, Chief. It's not the end of the world.

Filem?n P?:
Dead weight, Mortadelo. The Super called me dead weight!

Mortadelo:
Look on the bright side. If he said you're dead weight, he probably meant that you're a heavyweight... a burden... a dead weight...

Calimero, el Tirano:
[on the red phone] Who is it?

Nadiusko, esp?a ruso:
Ah, Mr. Excellency. Good morning, Generalissimo. It's Nadiusko. At your and the fatherland's service. I don't know if you remember...

Fredy Mazas:
AHHHHHHHHHHH!

Nadiusko, esp?a ruso:
Anyway... What a beautiful country. And the people are so charming. And 2 phones... a red one and a black one... What's the black one for?

Calimero, el Tirano:
For ordering people's heads cut off when they lie to me on the red one.

Nadiusko, esp?a ruso:
Really?

Ofelia:
Mortadelo, how will you introduce me? As your fianc?e, your lover, your confident...?

Mortadelo:
His Excellency's son and... maid.

Fredy Mazas:
Hi, six-toes! Don't you like the milk of our country?

Mortadelo:
What do you mean?

Fredy Mazas:
As you brought your own cow...

Mortadelo:
[laughing] VERY WITTY, DUDE, VERY WITTY!

El Profesor Bacterio:
[from the bathroom] Ofelia, bring me some blank papers! There's a fax coming in!