La science des rêves

Guy:
Are you interested in Martine ?

Stephane:
Martine from work ?

Guy:
No, Martin Scorsese.

Stephane:
[ Shows 3-D glasses ] You can see real life in 3-D

St?phanie:
Isn't life already in 3-D?

Stephane:
Yeah but, come on.

Stephane:
It's like touching your penis with your left hand.

St?phanie:
I don't have a penis.

Stephane:
But you have a left hand.

Stephane:
I am your neighbor and a liar. By the way, do you have Zoe's number?

[first lines]

Stephane:
?Un, dos, tres, cuatro!

[St?phane plays the drums, then the piano, then moves the cameras. "St?phane TV"]

Stephane:
Hi, and welcome back to another episode of "T?l?vision Educative". Tonight, I'll show you how dreams are prepared. People think it's a very simple and easy process but it's a bit more complicated than that. As you can see, a very delicate combination of complex ingredients is the key. First, we put in some random thoughts. And then, we add a little bit of reminiscences of the day... mixed with some memories from the past.

[adds two bunchs of pasta]

Stephane:
That's for two people. Love, friendships, relationships... and all those "ships", together with songs you heard during the day, things you saw, and also, uh... personal... Okay, I think it's one.

[Red smoke comes out of the pot]

Stephane:
There it goes. Yes! Yes.

[coughs]

Stephane:
Okay, we have to run.

St?phanie:
How's is your hand?

Stephane:
It started to smell like a foot.

St?phanie:
Its a good sign.

Stephane:
I don't want to be Spaghetti...

St?phanie:
Distraction is an obstruction for the construction.

[giving advice to St?phane in a ski dream]

Serge:
St?phane, talk with the heart!

Martine:
Yeah, be gentle!

Guy:
F*** her!

St?phanie:
[to St?phane] You have a serious problem of distorting reality. You could sleep with the entire planet and still feel rejected.

[last lines]

St?phanie:
St?phane?

Stephane:
In dreams, emotions are overwhelming.

Stephane:
Will you marry me when you are seventy? You'd have nothing to lose.

Stephane:
[after giving Stephanie the one second time traveling machine] For the occasion of... you're pretty.

St?phanie:
How's your head?

Stephane:
It's okay. It's not normal though...

St?phanie:
It's never going to be.

Stephane:
I like your b*obs. They're very friendly and unpretentious.

Stephane:
Are you trying to mock me on live television?

Guy:
[after throwing Guy's TV set into the canal] It floats!

Stephane:
Yeah, it floats.

Guy:
Now the fish can watch crappy shows from below.

St?phanie:
I have big hands.

Stephane:
That means you have a large penis.

Stephane:
[embarrassed]... That was inappropriate...

Stephane:
P. S. R. Parallel Synchronized Randomness. An interesting brain rarity and our subject for today. Two people walk in opposite directions at the same time and then they make the same decision at the same time. Then they correct it, and then they correct it, and then they correct it, and then they correct it, and then they correct it. Basically, in a mathematical world these two little guys will stay looped for the end of time. The brain is the most complex thing in the universe and it's right behind the nose. [plays drums] Fascinating!

Serge:
Guy is making me smell the sperm!

St?phanie:
Things'll turn out the way you want, if you could just stop doubting that I love you. Call me home. Next door.

Serge:
A heart that sighs has not what its desire.

St?phanie:
Anarchy in the cellophane!

Stephane:
You know, sometimes I wear my jeans for more than a week until they're really bad. And it makes me feel closer to you

St?phanie:
Why me?

Stephane:
[Stephane covering his face with the pillow] Because everyone else is boring. And because you're different.

Guy:
f***, an artist, he'll never last

St?phanie:
Why me?

Stephane:
Because everyone else is boring. And because you are different.You don't like me,St?phanie.

St?phanie:
Organization always merges back if you don't pay attention.

Stephane:
Death to organization.

Monsieur Pouchet:
What does he shave with, toast?

Stephane:
What's 'shave toast'?

Stephane:
[Zoe is dancing flirtaciously with Guy] Does she always dance like that?

St?phanie:
Yeah.

Stephane:
I mean, is it always like that? Or just when shes been drinking?

St?phanie:
Do you have a problem with it?

Stephane:
No, I just can't imagine how anyone would end up doing that with Guy.

Serge:
It's one thing to be called fags, but to be called dykes is unacceptable.

Stephane:
The brain is the most complex thing in the universe, and it's right behind the nose!

Stephane:
This girl is at once all the women that broke my heart. She is so beautiful and generous, and she's asking me to leave... because she is dumping me.

Stephane:
She's dumping me because I am a cheap drug dealer, and I am a drug dealer because she wants to leave me.

Stephane:
The police are going to get me now, this is all my fault.

St?phanie:
Randomness is very difficult to achieve.

Stephane:
It's as if her synapses were married directly to her fingers.