Last Unicorn

Mommy Fortuna:
Oh she'll kill me one day or another. But she will remember forever that *I* caught her, and *I* held her prisoner. So there's my immortality, hey?

Schmendrick:
Oh, she should never have meddled with a real harpy! Or a real unicorn for that matter. Because the truth melts her magic, always.

Unicorn:
I have forgotten that men cannot see Unicorns. If men no longer know what they're looking at, there may be other unicorns in the world yet, unknown, and glad of it.

Schmendrick:
I know you. If I were blind I'd know what you are.

Molly:
Where were you twenty years ago? Ten years ago? Where were you when I was new? When I was one of those innocent young maidens you always come to? How dare you! How dare you come to me now, when I am this!

Schmendrick:
The magic chose the shape, not I. I am a bearer, I am a dwelling, I am a messenger...

Molly:
You are an idiot!

Haggard:
You may come and go as you please. My secrets guard themselves. Will yours do the same?

Schmendrick:
I can't do this very much longer. He had me juggling teacups all night long. Teacups! With tea in them!

Almathea:
Drown out my dreams! Keep me from remembering whatever wants me to remember it!

Haggard:
Love is slowing you down, my lady. I will catch you at last, if you love much more.

Amalthea:
Once, I can't remember, I was long ago, someone strange. I was innocent and wise, and full of pain. Now that I'm a woman, everything has changed. Once, when I was searching, somewhere out of reach, far away, in a place I could not find, or heart obey. Now that I'm a woman, everything is strange.

The Cat:
No cat out of its first fur was ever deceived by appearances, unlike human beings, who seem to enjoy it.

Butterfly:
No, no, listen. Don't listen to me, listen.

Schmendrick:
Don't cry. If you have become human enough to cry, then all the magic in the world cannot change you back.

Butterfly:
Your name is a golden bell hung in my heart. I would break my body to pieces to call you once by your name.

The Tree:
There is no immortality but a tree's love.

Schmendrick:
There are no happy endings because nothing ends.

Schmendrick the Magician:
Oh god, I'm engaged to a douglas fir!

Schmendrick the Magician:
Be rary of wousing a rizard's wrath - rousing a rizard's - Be wary of making a magician angry!

The Cat:
No cat anywhere ever gave anyone a straight answer.

Prince Lir:
Heroes know that things must happen when it is time for them to happen. A quest may not simply be abandoned; unicorns may go unrescued for a long time, but not forever; a happy ending cannot come in the middle of the story.

Molly Grue:
What is the use of wizardry if it cannot save a unicorn?

Schmendrick the Magician:
That is what heroes are for.

Schmendrick the Magician:
She will remember your heart when men are fairy tales in books written by rabbits. Of all unicorns, she is the only one who knows what regret is - and love.

The Unicorn:
Never run from anyting immortal; it only attracts their attention.

The Butterfly:
They passed down all the roads long ago. And the Red Bull ran behind them, and covered their footsteps.

Schmendrick:
It is very rare that a person is taken for what they truly are.

Schmendrick:
You pile of stones! I'll set all your toenails growing in, you mess with me!

Schmendrick:
Shut up, you pretentious kneecap! How'd you like a punch in the eye?

Unicorn:
I am the only unicorn there is? The last?

Unicorn:
There has never been a time without unicorns. We live forever! We are as old as the sky, old as the moon! We can be hunted, trapped; we can even be killed if we leave our forests, but we do not *vanish*. Am I truly the last?

The Butterfly:
It's you and me, moth! Hand to hand to hand to hand to hand to...

Unicorn:
I can never regret. I can feel sorrow, but it's not the same thing.

Prince Lir:
The lift of longing / The crash of loss / The bitterness of... cross? boss? moss? Damn!

King Haggard:
I know you!

King Haggard:
I almost knew you as soon as I saw you on the road coming to my door. Since then, there is no movement of yours that has not betrayed you! A pace, a glance, a turn of the head, the flash of your throat as you breathe... even your way of standing perfectly still - they were all my spies!

King Haggard:
Each time I see the unicorns, MY unicorns, it is like that morning in the woods, and I am truly young, in spite of myself!

Prince Lir:
Unicorn, mermaid, sorceress... no name you could give her would surprise OR frighten me. I love whom I love.

Schmendrick:
Well, that's a very nice sentiment, but when I change her back into her true self...

Prince Lir:
I love whom I love.

Unicorn:
I'm a little afraid to go home. I have been mortal, and some part of me is mortal yet. I am no longer like the others, for no unicorn was ever born who could regret, but now I do. I regret.

Schmendrick:
I am sorry. I have done you evil and I cannot undo it.

Unicorn:
No. Unicorns are in the world again! No sorrow will live in me with that joy... save one - and I thank you for that part, too.

Unicorn:
You are a true wizard now, as you always wished. Does it make you happy?

Schmendrick:
Well... men don't always know when they're happy. But I - I think so.

Unicorn:
I can feel this body DYING all around me!

Unicorn:
Once, I can't remember, I was long ago, someone strange. I was innocent and wise, and full of pain. Now that I'm a woman, everything has changed. Once, when I was searching, somewhere out of reach, far away, in a place I could not find, or heart obey. Now that I'm a woman, everything is strange.

Schmendrick:
I am Schmendrick the magician, last of the red hot swamis.

Unicorn:
Or is the story of the Red Bull just another of his songs? I can't leave the forest, but I must know if I'm the only unicorn left in the world. What if they're hiding together... somewhere far away? What if they're waiting for me? In need of my help?

The Unicorn:
I'm looking for others like me.

The Unicorn:
Have you seen them, Magician?

Schmendrick:
No, I've never seen anyone like you.

Schmendrick:
Not while I was awake, anyway.