Llamas with Hats

Carl:
My stomach was making the rumblies - that only hands would satisfy.

Paul:
*Caaarrrrlllll!*

Paul:
Carl, there is a dead human in our house.

Carl:
Oh, hey, how did he get here?

Paul:
*Caarrrlllll*, what did you do?

Paul:
Tell me, Carl. Exactly what you were doing before I got home.

Carl:
Alright, well I was upstairs.

Paul:
Okay.

Carl:
I was, I was sitting in my room.

Paul:
Yes.

Carl:
Reading a book.

Paul:
Go on.

Carl:
And uh, well this guy walked in.

Paul:
Okay.

Carl:
So I went up to him.

Paul:
Yes.

Carl:
And I, uh, stabbed him 37 times in the chest.

Paul:
*Caarrrllll*, that kills people!

Carl:
Oh, oh, well I-I-I didn't know that.

Paul:
How could you not know that?

Carl:
Yeah, I'm in the wrong here. I suck.

Carl:
I don't kill people. That is - that is my least favourite thing to do.

Paul:
Carl, did you finish your meat dragon?

Carl:
Maybe.

Paul:
*sigh* it's horrifying Carl.

Carl:
Thank you.

I do not kill people that is my least favorite thing to do.

Carl:

Shhhh, do you hear that? That’s the sound of forgiveness.

Paul:

That’s the sound of people drowning, Carl.

Carl:

That’s what forgiveness sounds like. Screaming and then silence.

Carl:
I have no where to go. I burned my house down once I had enough swans inside. And I used up all my savings buying the swans.

Paul:
And who’s fault is that.

Carl:
Society. Society and Swans.