Magic Mike

Mike Martingano:
[dressed as a police officer] Good evening. You live here?

Kim:
Yeah.

Mike Martingano:
Yeah? What's your name?

Kim:
Kim.

Mike Martingano:
Kim, can you move back for me, please?

[enters house full of women]

Mike Martingano:
We keep getting complaints about noise and underage drinking. Everybody sit down, we're gonna be here for a while! You don't have anything sharp on you that I can stick myself with, do you?

Kim:
No.

Mike Martingano:
Good. 'Cause I do!

[rips off pants, women scream]

Dallas:
Will you welcome to the stage, the one, the only... Magic Mike!

Dallas:
[to The Kid] You are the husband they never had! You are that dreamboat guy that never came along!

Paige:
Entrepreneur/stripper? Stripper/entrepreneur?

Mike Martingano:
Either one.

Paige:
I was hoping this was all a joke.

Mike Martingano:
It is pretty funny.

Dallas:
Fact is, the law says you cannot touch! [smiles] But I think I see a lotta lawbreakers up in this house tonight...

Mike Martingano:
I have, like, $13,000 saved.

Paige:
Wow. That's a lot of ones.

Mike Martingano:
There are some fives in there.

Paige:
Oh, ok. No twenties?

Mike Martingano:
Oh, you don't wanna know what I have to do for twenties.

[from trailer]

Mike Martingano:
So you gonna come to the show tonight?

Paige:
No.

Mike Martingano:
You're gonna come to the show tonight.

Paige:
No!

Mike Martingano:
You just said over there that you like the show!

Paige:
That doesn't mean I'm gonna go again!

The Kid:
[from trailer] Are you hitting on my sister?

Mike Martingano:
How pregnant did you get that girl's mouth last night?

The Kid:
You're a f***ing stripper?

Dallas:
He's young, good looking... [about The Kid]

Mike Martingano:
He can't dance for sure.

Dallas:
He can't dance for sh*t, but that is teachable.

Joanna:
I don't normally like blondes, I know, but she's really cute.

Mike Martingano:
Yeah, but she's not going to be like you know, our type. You know what I'm saying?

Joanna:
So, you're not into her?

Mike Martingano:
No,no, that's not what I'm saying, she's like, she's a little uptight.

Joanna:
OK, well we're f***ing her, not taking her to dinner.

Mike Martingano:
That's not going to happen. She's a dinner type is what I'm trying to say, if you get me.

Joanna:
Oh, OK, um, if you decide you want to share... If you change your mind and put some effort into it, you know my number. And besides you know how much I love to eat.