Merlin's Apprentice

Jack:
I talked with Merlin.

Brianna:
I heard.

Jack:
You heard?

Brianna:
The pig told me.

Jack:
What about the bridge?

Merlin:
I'll raise the bridge.

Jack:
If you are my father and she were my mother... What were you?... Drunk?

Jack:
The ring that was lost... [with joy]... has been found, Pig! Found by Jack!

Yvonne:
My nobility is a harlot's costume.

Jack:
[trying to talk to the pedestal that held the Grail] Maybe we're not so different, you and I. Well, except that you're a reciprocal of eternal goodness, and I've never been a reciprocal for much more than I could stuff in my pockets...

Brianna:
[Brianna walks in] Am I interrupting?

Jack:
Not unless you've come to try to kill me.

Jack:
[Trying to cast a spell to stop Squire Brian's attack] You don't hate me!

Brianna:
Not you but one you are sworn to protect! And with a magic that will soon grow powerful!

Jack:
You really like me! [He growls angrily, Jack picks up Merlin's wand] You... love me! [Squire Brian kisses him] Not that much! [He throws himself at Merlin and his clothes tear] Your name's not really Brian, is it?

Brianna:
Brianna.

Graham:
[Angrily after pulling Jack out of the water] No magic! Do you understand?

Jack:
[coughing] You're safe... I'm too hungover...

Jack:
[after Brianna tells him about her past] I see... I just know I'm going to regret doing this, but... Would you mind closing your eyes for a moment? [She closes her eyes and he takes off the love spell] Don't worry, I won't tell a soul.

Brianna:
[punches him] Damn right you won't! [Picks up an ax]

Jack:
Brianna! I took off the spell! Let me live! [She throws the ax at him]

Jack:
[to Brianna and Graham, as he's about to look into Yvonne's memories] You two hold on as well. I'm tired of screwing up alone.

Brianna:
[Seeing Jack drinking] I don't have a lot of practice at this sort of thing...

Jack:
Brianna! Come and join us! The Grails right there and it still won't come back! We have front row seats to the end of Camelot!

Brianna:
Jack, no one blames you. The Grail disappeared long before you came...

Jack:
We don't care who made the Grail go away. We only care why it won't come back. [beat] I always wanted to be special, you know? And when I came to Camelot I got exactly what I wanted... everyone staring at me, asking me what to do, asking me for advice! Did I mention that I'm special Brianna? Because I really I meant it. Did you know that Rauskaug's enchanter, the Lady of the Lake, is my mother?

Brianna:
What?

Jack:
Oh, yes! And Merlin... Merlin is my father. Not just a father figure, but the man himself! [beat] You know why the Grail won't come back? Because there's still a stain on Camelot... me.

Brianna:
Jack, I don't think...

Jack:
Really? I think everyone deserves an opinion on the subject. Why don't I go ask them right now? [stumbles off toward Camelot's camp]