Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil

John Kelso:
Why don't you come in?

Minerva:
I never enter the office on Sunday. Ba-a-d juju.

John Kelso:
Hey, Joe, what happened?

Joe Odom:
Oh, that Jim Williams went and shot somebody. Canapé?

John Kelso:
This place is fantastic; it's like "Gone With The Wind" on mescaline. They walk imaginary pets here, Garland---on a f***ing leash. And they're all heavily armed and drunk. New York is boring!

Jim Williams:
I gave him what he needed, and he gave me what I needed.

The Lady Chablis:
It's like my mother always said: "Two tears in a bucket, motherf*** it."

John Kelso:
Hmm. I'll have to remember that one.

John Kelso:
Chablis, I'm... I'm straight.

The Lady Chablis:
So am I. Straight back to my house.

Jim Williams:
What a genteel way of asking if I come from old money.

John Kelso:
Well, are you?

Jim Williams:
No, what money I have is about eleven years old.

Jim Williams:
I'm what they call "nouveau riche," but then, it's only the "riche" that counts.

Jim Williams:
Livin' here pisses off all the right people.

Jim Williams:
So, which conversation shall we join?

John Kelso:
The one least likely to involve gunfire.

Minerva:
To understand the living, you got to commune with the dead.

Jim Williams:
Sport, truth, like art, is in the eye of the beholder. You believe what you choose and I'll believe what I know.

Mandy Nichols:
If you're thirsty, a drink will cure it, if you're not, a drink will prevent it. Prevention is better than a cure.

Billy Carl Hanson:
You don't give me warnings, I give them to you, remember, 'cause I can back mine up.

The Lady Chablis:
Are you the flower man?

The Lady Chablis:
If your husband's a gyno, honey, he's all mine.

Jim Williams:
True story, and deliciously evil, don't you think?

Minerva:
The half hour before midnight is for doin' good. The half hour after midnight is for doin' evil -- seems like we need a little of both tonight.