Miracles for Sale

Dad Morgan:
[to Duvallo] New York is the only town I've ever been in that you could learn to hate in a day.

Dad Morgan:
[indicating the sign on his son's shop, "Miracles for Sale"] Well, if you wanted to go into business, why didn't you open a butcher shop? Now, selling meat's a business, but, selling miracles - that's monkey business.

Dad Morgan:
[in his son's shop: looking at a stage prop skull which moves its jaws up and down] You must've been a woman. You know you're dead, but you're still trying to talk.

Dad Morgan:
Who drew all those funny marks on the floor?

Michael Morgan:
Ghosts.

Dad Morgan:
What?

Michael Morgan:
Ghosts!

Dad Morgan:
Ooh... I thought you said "goats." Well, how comes that you don't know that Siberian dungeon trick, and Duvallo does? He can't be very smart - he was born in New York...

Michael Morgan:
You'd like my father. He thinks everybody in New York oughta' be shot - and he's dying to start the movement.

Inspector Gavigan:
[exasperated] Aw, why can't I draw a nice, clean axe-murderer up in the Bronx!

Quinn:
[a dead body at the crime scene has suddenly disappeared] Fine police department we are: even dead guys disappear on us. I don't like this magic stuff!

Inspector Gavigan:
Don't let anything funny happen, because if you do, I'm gonna' say a few magic words over you and your JOB will disappear!