Mr. Peabody & Sherman

Judge:
Mr. Peabody, you're a Nobel Prize-winning scientist, a world-renowned explorer, and you're an Olympic gold medalist in the long jump and the decathlon. You're sure you're capable of meeting all the challenges of raising a human boy?

Peabody:
Given all that I've accomplished, how hard could it possibly be?

[Mr. Peabody hugs Sherman after he successfully adopts him]

Baby Sherman:
Dada!

Mr. Peabody:
No, Sherman, not "Dada". You shall call me "Mr. Peabody", or in less formal moments, simply "Peabody".

Baby Sherman:
Meeba Peababa?

Mr. Peabody:
That's right. Mr. Peababa. [Hugs Sherman and holds him up for a photo shot]

[As Mr. Peabody heads for Sherman's door to let him sleep]

Sherman:
I love you, Mr. Peabody.

Mr. Peabody:
[Brief pause] I have a deep regard for you, as well, Sherman. [Turns off the light and leaves the room]

[Mr. Peabody comes to check on Sherman and Penny]

Sherman:
[Angrily] Why didn't you tell me she was coming over here?!

Mr. Peabody:
Hello Jack, who is Athenian, how was your voting?

Jack

Mr. Peabody:
You're welcome.

Sherman:
[Angrily] I don't know what you think we're supposed to do in here anyway! She hates me!

Mr. Peabody:
Share your interests. Tell her a witty anecdote.

Sherman:
Mr. Peabody, I... hate... her.

Mr. Peabody:
Sherman, every great relationship starts from a place of conflict, and evolves into something richer. [A dumbstruck Sherman stares at Mr. Peabody blankly.] Bonne chance. [closes the door, but comes back in] Make it work. [closes it, but comes back in again] But don’t tell her about the WABAC. (Okay?) [closes it and leaves]

Sherman:
You know, Penny, Sigmund Freud says if you don't like a person, it's because they remind you of something you don't like about yourself.

Penny Peterson:
[annoyed] What do you know about Sigmund Freud?

Sherman:
More than you think.

Penny:
[faces him; sarcastically] Sure. Just like you knew all that stuff about George Washington not really cutting down a cherry tree. [stands up from a chair] Ugh! What a crock!

Sherman:
[defensively] But it's true!

Penny:
How do you know?

Sherman:
I just know!

Penny:
Did you read it in a book?

Sherman:
No.

Penny:
See it in a movie?

Sherman:
No.

Penny:
Did your brainiac dad tell you?

Sherman:
No!

Penny:
[advances toward him, pointing a threatening finger at him] Then how do you know, Sherman? How... do... you... know!?

Sherman:
He told me!

Penny:
Who told you?

Sherman:
George Washington! [gasps, puts a hand over his mouth]

Penny:
[in disbelief] George Washington?

Sherman:
Yeah. [Covers his mouth again]

Penny:
[Scoffs] Liar. [Sherman pauses for a minute after he accidentally told Penny, as he remembers what Peabody told him]

Mr. Peabody:
[in Sherman's mind] Don't tell her about the WABAC.

Mr. Peabody:
[To Sherman, who just returned from the WABAC room] I've really hit off with Penny's parents. I think we can file this night under "Unqualified Success".

Sherman:
I'd hold off filing it just yet.

Mr. Peabody:
What do you mean? [looks around] Where's Penny?

Sherman:
[guiltily] Um... Ancient Egypt… (And it's "when", not "where".)

Mr. Peabody:
[gasps in shock] You used the WABAC!? [growls in frustration]

Paul Peterson:
What's happening, big guy? We're a little low.

Mr. Peabody:
[continues growling in frustration, then turns to the Petersons] I'll be right there, Paul. [to Sherman; softly and angry] How could you do such a thing?!

Sherman:
She called me a liar for saying George Washington never cut down a cherry tree!

Mr. Peabody:
So you took her to see George Washington?!

Sherman:
Yeah... She was into it.

Mr. Peabody:
Penny, come here, right now. Penny, come.

Penny:
I'm not Penny, anymore. Now, I'm Princess Hatshepsut, precious flower of the Nile.

[King Tut announces his engagement with Penny]

Sherman:
What?! You can't marry this guy!

Penny:
Why not?

Sherman:
Well, for 1 - his name rhymes with butt!

Penny:
I don't care. I going to have a big fat Egyptian wedding!

Mr. Peabody:
Spoiler alert - King Tut dies young. Are you sure you've thought this through?

Penny:
Oh, trust me, I've thought it through. I'm getting everything.

[Ay, the Grand Vizier, arrives]

Sherman:
Who is he?

Mr. Peabody:
He is Ay.

Sherman:
He is you?

Ay:
I am Ay, the Grand Vizier.

Mr. Peabody:
Yeah, that's his name.

Sherman:
Oh.

[Mr. Peabody and Sherman are sealed up in a dark tomb]

Sherman:
Mr. Peabody?

Mr. Peabody:
Yes, Sherman?

Sherman:
Can I hold your hand?

Mr. Peabody:
Of course, you can.

Sherman:
[brief pause] Boy, your hand's cold, Mr. Peabody.

Mr. Peabody:
Sherman?

Sherman:
Yeah?

Mr. Peabody:
[ignites a torch] That's not my hand.

Sherman:
[notices that he's holding a mummified hand] Ahhh! [Jerks away the hand and the arm dislocates and falls to the ground] Ahhhhhh! [jumps into Peabody's empty arm]

Mr. Peabody:
That's (literally) disarming. Now to find a way outta here.

[Peabody and Sherman are escaping the tomb, but they ran into a puzzle room]

Mr. Peabody:
Ah, ah, ah! Careful, Sherman. It's a booby trap. [Sherman laughs] What's so funny?

Sherman:
You said "booby"! [Continues laughing, but suddenly stops as he notices Peabody's glare]

Mr. Peabody:
One wrong step and we're done for.

[Mr. Peabody and Sherman are inside the mouth of the statue of Anubis, impersonating him to call off the wedding]

Ay:
But Anubis, the sun god Ra has decreed that this girl is to be the boy king's wife!

Mr. Peabody [as Anubis]:
That's so funny. I was talking to the sun god Ra just the other day, and he told me he'd changed his mind. "Old Flip-Flop Ra", we call him here in the Underworld.

Ay:
Really? But it's too late! We've already paid for the catering!

Mr. Peabody:
[as Sherman spews fire out of the statue's mouth] Too bad, you're going to lose your deposit!

Leonardo Da Vinci:
[trying to get Mona Lisa to smile] Think of all the beautiful things Italy has. The Sistine Chapel, Florence, Venice, the countryside...

Mona Lisa:
[Angrily stands up from her chair] All these things I have not seen, because you keep me here all day seated on my abbondanza!

Sherman:
[shocked; to Mr. Peabody] I don't think that means "chair" in Italian.

Sherman:
[he and Penny discover Da Vinci's Workshop] It's like a museum.

Penny:
It's like a toy store!

[They smile at each other]

[Sherman explains how Da Vinci's flying machine works]

Penny:
But how do you get it to go?

Sherman:
Huh?

Penny:
How do you take off?

Sherman:
Oh, you just pull down that lever. [points at a lever]

Penny:
[takes a hold of the lever, mischievously] This one?

Sherman:
[regretful] Oh, boy. [Penny launches the machine with Sherman and herself on board] Aah!

Mr. Peabody:
[to Leonardo; about Sherman] Why can't children be simple?

Leonardo:
Children are not machines, Peabody. I tried to build one... It was creepy. [sputters at the thought]

Da Vinci:
[spots his flying machine] Hey, look-a, Peabody! It's my flying machi–! My flying machine!?

Mr. Peabody:
[notices that Sherman and Penny are on board] Sherman, Sherman!? Sherman, what are you doing up there?!

Sherman:
[excitedly] I'm flying!

Mr. Peabody:
But Sherman, you don't know how to fly!

Sherman:
[confused] I don't?

Mr. Peabody:
No!

Sherman:
I'm sorry I broke the plane, Mr. Peabody.

Mr. Peabody:
[angrily] Well, you should be! You could've been killed!

Penny:
[outraged] What are you talking about?! Sherman flew a plane. [happily] He was amazing!

Mr. Peabody:
Sherman destroyed a priceless historical artifact.

Penny:
Whatever. You should be happy. Turns out that Sherman's not a complete and total loser after all.

Sherman:
[stands up proudly] Yeah, Mr. Peabody! Turns out I'm not a complete and total loser after all.

[Peabody gives him a firm look and Sherman shrinks back into his seat]

Mr. Peabody:
[to Penny] Miss Peterson, stop turning my son into a hooligan!

Penny:
It's not my fault he's a hooligan.

Sherman:
Yeah, it's not her fault I'm a hooligan.

Mr. Peabody:
[raising his voice] Well, its certainly not my fault! I've spent the last 7 years teaching Sherman good judgment!

Penny:
If you're such a great parent, why is Miss Grunion trying to take Sherman away from you?

[Mr. Peabody shrinks back and looks down sadly as Sherman goes into a deep shock]

Sherman:
[gets up from his chair] (W-what?) Is that true? Is somebody gonna take me away from you?

Mr. Peabody:
[regaining composure] No, Sherman. I'll never let that happen. You just need to trust me.

[Peabody, Penny and an angry Sherman are trying to evade a black hole in the WABAC]

Sherman:
Why didn't you tell me?!

Mr. Peabody:
[concentrating on the controls] Tell you what?!

Sherman:
[stands up] Why didn't you tell me Miss Grunion was trying to take me away from you?!

Mr. Peabody:
It's not your job to worry about these things!

Sherman:
[angrily] You just didn't think I could handle it!

Mr. Peabody:
You'll discuss it later. Now, sit down.

Sherman:
[angrily grabs Peabody to make eye contact with him] I DON'T WANT TO DISCUSS IT LATER!

Mr. Peabody:
[firmly] Sherman, sit.

Sherman:
[muttering, sits back in his seat and turns away] You can't talk to me like that. I'm not a dog.

Mr. Peabody:
[shocked] What did you say?!

Sherman:
[finally loses his temper] I said I'm not a dog!

Mr. Peabody:
[hurt] You're right, Sherman! You're not! [angrily] You're just a very bad boy! [Sherman felts hurtful]

[Sherman and Penny speak at the same time in unison to mr. peabody]

Sherman and Penny:
Mr. Peabody.

Mr. Peabody:
Sherman? Penny?

Sherman and Penny:
Can we talk to you a second?

Mr. Peabody:
Of course. excuse me. [To Sherman and Penny, who just returned from the WABAC room] I've really hit off with Penny's parents. I think we can file this night under "Unqualified Success".

Sherman and Penny:
I'd hold off filing it just yet.

Mr. Peabody:
What do you mean? [looks around] Why are you two dressed... like ancient Greeks? You used the WABAC!

Sherman:
I did I know, it's terrible!

Mr. Peabody:
But why?

Sherman:
Penny and I got into an argument about George Washington.

Penny:
So, I made him show me the WABAC.

Sherman:
And I lost her in ancient Egypt.

Penny:
And I got engaged to King Tut.

Sherman:
So, I came back and got you.

Penny:
Then we ran out of gas.

Sherman:
In Florence.

Penny:
Went into a black hole.

Sherman:
And then you died in ancient Troy.

Mr. Peabody:
Died? I have a hard time believing that.

Sherman and Penny:
It's true...!

Sherman:
...But now you're here, and everything's gonna be okay.

Mr. Peabody:
I told you never to come back to a time when you existed... Because there would be two of you!

Sherman:
Yeah, but the other one of me is in ancient Egypt.

[Odysseus arrives at the the hatch]

Agamemnon:
Odysseus, what news do you bring?

Odysseus:
[holds a mini figure of the Trojan Horse] Someone left this for us!

Agamemnon:
A present. Nice! It looks just like our horse.

Odysseus:
[pause] Should I bring it inside?

Agamemnon:
[thinks about it for a second] It'd be rude not to.

[Odysseus brings the horse inside and Peabody pops out of it]

Greek Soldiers:
Ahhh!

Agamemnon:
[laughing] I did NOT see that coming!

Penny:
[Pops out of the horse and sniffs] Ugh! Jeez-Louise! What is that smell?

Agamemnon:
[Sniffs his armpit] That is the smell of victory! [Greeks cheer]

Mr. Peabody:
[he and Penny hop out of the horse] Greetings men of Sparta, Athens and Thebes, Peabody here. I've come for Sherman.

Agamemnon:
[to Sherman] You know this guy?

Sherman:
[Unhappily] I thought I did, but now, I'm not so sure.

Agamemnon:
Then he must be a spy. [to his men] KILL HIM!

[The Greeks draw their swords]

Sherman:
[stops the Greeks] No, no! He's... [embarrassed] My dad.

Greek:
[confused] Your dad?

Penny:
It's an adoptive relationship (but the opposite).

Agamemnon:
Awww!

Mr. Peabody:
Thank you for taking care of my son, Agamemnon, but it is time for him to come home.

Sherman:
Sorry, Mr. Peabody. I've joined the Greek Army.

Agamemnon:
[lifts Sherman up to his shoulder] Shermanus is one of us, now. He's a brother.

Shermanus:
I'm his brother.

Mr. Peabody:
[protesting] He is my son.

Agamemnon:
He took an oath!

Shermanus:
I took an oath.

Mr. Peabody:
He's 7!

Agamemnon:
[Sherman whispers into his ear] And a half!

[Agamemnon and his men are preparing to ambush the Trojans; Sherman tries to join up with him, but Peabody and Penny get in his way]

Agamemnon:
Zeus on 3! 1...

Mr. Peabody:
[Desperately] Sherman, I absolutely forbid you to fight in the Trojan War!

Sherman/Shermanus:
[defiantly] Its not fair! [walks beside them] All my friends are fighting in the Trojan War.

Agamemnon:
2...

Mr. Peabody:
Sherman, it's dangerous!

Sherman/Shermanus:
I'm wearing a helmet!

Agamemnon:
3...!

Mr. Peabody:
You're not going!

Shermanus:
Oh, yes, I am!

Agamemnon:
Zeus! [he, Sherman, and the Greeks begin to ambush the Trojans]

[Peabody, Sherman and Penny are fleeing to the WABAC after Peabody bit Miss Grunion]

Sherman:
I can't believe you bit her, Mr. Peabody.

Mr. Peabody:
I know, Sherman. It was wrong.

Sherman:
Wrong? It was awesome!

Da Vinci:
[falls into the WABAC windshield] Hey-a, Peabody! [falls off]

Sherman:
[Shocked] Looks like the past is coming to us!

Robespierre:
[Falls into the windshield] I will get you, dog, and your little boy too! [falls off]

King Tut:
[Falls into the windshield] Penny, my bride! [A jealous Sherman uses the windshield wipers to chuck Tut off] Ahhh!

[Peabody glares at Sherman, as Penny looks at Sherman, lovingly]

Sherman:
[notices Peabody glaring at him] What?

Agamemnon:
[Falls from the hole into a cop car with Grunion, and the Petersons in it; Spots Grunion] What sort of creature are you?!

Miss Grunion:
The name's Grunion! [The car takes off]

Agamemnon:
I'm in love!

[Cops surround the WABAC and the historical figures, including Robespierre and Agamemnon]

Cop:
[To Robespierre] Drop the sabre and step away from the futuristic orb!

Robespierre:
[Defiantly] I take orders from no man! Liberte! Fraternite! Egalite! [Cop tasers him] Ooh-la-la! [Collapses]

Agamemnon:
[Chuckles nervously] Don't tase me, bro. [he and other historical figures back away]

[George Washington arrives to assist Mr. Peabody, who's about to be taken to the pound]

George Washington:
[clears his throat] We hold these truths to be self-evident; that all men, and some dogs, are created equal. I hereby award Mr. Peabody a Presidential pardon.

Abraham Lincoln:
[Suddenly appears] Me, too!

Bill Clinton:
[Suddenly appears] I've done worse.

[As Sherman heads for school]

Mr. Peabody:
Sherman, wait!

Sherman:
Yes, Mr. Peabody?

Mr. Peabody:
I... (I'm sorry I called you a bad boy and...) I love you, Sherman.

Sherman:
[smiles] I have a deep regard for you as well, Mr. Peabody. [he and Mr. Peabody embrace]

'Mr. Peabody:
[to the audience; breaking the 4th wall] No doubt about it. Every dog should have a boy.