My Blue Heaven

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
What a day for a mow eh?

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
When did your wife leave?

Barney:
October.

Vince:
That's when my wife left! What is it about the month of October?

Barney:
I dunno. The pressure of Halloween? You never know what to go as!

Hannah Stubbs:
And where did you learn to jump start a car?

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
I had to learn to jump start ambulances, to get invalids to the dialysis machines.

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
You dirty rat!

Johnny Bird:
Snitch!

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
Stool pigeon!

Johnny Bird:
Informer!

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
Squealer!

Johnny Bird:
You dirty rat!

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
I already said you dirty rat!

Johnny Bird:
Yeah, but I say it better.

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
What do you think?

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
You know, it's dangerous for you to be here in the frozen food section.

Shaldeen:
Why is that?

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
Because you could melt all this stuff.

Hannah Stubbs:
The books...

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
You have something against books?

Hannah Stubbs:
I have nothing about books! I am curious about the books in your trunk.

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
You see, I was thinking of writing my story, so I bought this one on how to do it.

Hannah Stubbs:
Why do you need 25 copies of it?

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
In case I want to read it more than once...

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
Richie loved to use 22s because the bullets are small and they don't come out the other end like a 45, see, a 45 will blow a barn door out the back of your head and there's a lot of dry cleaning involved, but a 22 will just rattle around like Pac-Man until you're dead.

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
You know, sometimes I even amaze myself.

Hannah Stubbs:
I see that it's funny. I have a sense of humor.

Barney:
Of course you have a sense of humor. Everyone thinks they do, even people who don't.

Barney Coopersmith:
You don't tip FBI men!

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
Sure you do!

Linda:
Hello, I'd like a cab to pick me up at... what the frig is the address here?

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
How should I know? Number 1 Appy Street!

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
It's not tipping I believe in. It's overtipping.

Barney:
It's gonna be a lot easier if you two start calling each other Terry and Todd.

Linda:
It's a nice house, Terry, okay?

Barney:
No, you're Terry, he's Todd.

Barney:
The Padres play the Mets every so often, though you folks would probably be Yankees fans. It's been my experience that most organized crime people are.

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
I love the Yankees, Linda loves the Yankees, so does Terry.

Linda:
Who's Terry?

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
You are.

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
Green side up, fellas! Green side up!

Supermarket Employee:
Have a nice day.

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
F*** you!

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
I never touched a gun in my life. That and that alone forever doomed me to middle management.

Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli:
I am the worst case scenario of Thomas Jefferson's dream.

When I say I’m with you, mean I’m with YOU! To Barney in the bar.