Pirates of Silicon Valley

Steve Jobs:
Those guys think they're revolutionaries. They're not revolutionaries, we are.

Steve Wozniak:
We are?

Ballmer:
Bill, I don't know if it's the clothes on the floor or you, but something in here definitely needs to be hosed down.

Steve Jobs:
What is this? This is like doing business with a praying mantis. You get seduced, and then eaten alive afterwards?

Bill Gates:
Get real, would ya? You and I are both like guys who had this rich neighbor - Xerox - who left the door open all the time. And you go sneakin' in to steal a TV set. Only when you get there, you realize that I got there first. I got the loot, Steve! And you're yellin'? "That's not fair. I wanted to try to steal it first." You're too late.

Bill Gates:
There may be a few... similarities.

Steve Jobs:
Similarities? Similarities? Try theft.

Steve Jobs:
Hold it. I'm employee number one. I am. Woz?

Steve Wozniak:
Doesn't matter to me.

Steve Jobs:
I am employee number one.

Steve Jobs:
Tell you what, I'll be employee number zero. Woz, you can be number one, and I'll be employee number zero.

Steve Jobs:
Good artists copy, great artists steal.

Bill Gates:
Honest to God, Ballmer. You have no culture.

Ballmer:
Oh yeah, like you go around reading Plato! You're the only guy I know who can make furniture out of Playboys. Look, you got enough to make a chair. You don't have to worry about 'em moving around, 'cause they're all stuck together

Ballmer:
. They're all stuck together!

Steve Jobs:
We're better than you are! We have better stuff.

Bill Gates:
You don't get it, Steve. That doesn't matter!

Arlene:
Steve, why do you care what I call the baby?

Steve Jobs:
Because I don't want the baby named Rainbow! Or Orisha, or Ravi Shankar, or any other name like that.

Bill Gates:
Now, we know that IBM has set up this place to complete head-on with Apple, and that you're gearing up to come out with a personal computer that will wipe them out. So we can get you an operating system.

Bill Gates:
It's called DOS.

Ballmer:
You're the only guy I know who pays strippers to put their clothes on!

Ballmer:
Bill, you're gonna have to come up with a better pickup line because asking her her SAT score is NOT going to do it!

Paul Allen:
We think we might be able to, uh, mess with it, and, uh, resell it.

Paul Allen:
We've got some people we're sorta talkin' to. Some of 'em don't really want it known what we're doin' with 'em and they made us sign a secrecy agreement.

Paul Allen:
Fifty thousand.

Paul Allen:
Dollars.

Steve Jobs:
I don't want you to think of this as just a film - some process of converting electrons and magnetic impulses into shapes and figures and sounds - no. Listen to me. We're here to make a dent in the universe. Otherwise, why even be here? We're creating a completely new consciousness, like an artist or a poet. We're rewriting the history of human thought with what we're doing. That's how you have to think of this.

Ridley Scott:
Well, Steven, right now I'm a touch more worried about getting light on the actress, do you know what I mean?

Steve Jobs:
What's he talking about, the Altair? I never had a problem with the Altair - 'til I tried to use it!

Steve Jobs:
Maybe in a past life I was a poet - or an artist.

Bill Gates:
Think they're hookers?

Paul Allen:
Either that or motel inspectors. I saw one of them go into the room next to ours about a dozen times yesterday.

Bill Gates:
I don't understand - how does the hardware handle the mouse/cursor display?

Gilmore:
No, it's all right here in the software...

Steve Jobs:
Enough!

Gilmore:
Sorry, Steve.

Steve Jobs:
There's no use torturing our guests with what they can't have.

Steve Jobs:
You are putting poison into your body.

Steve Wozniak:
That's french fries, man. You know, all-American food?

Steve Jobs:
That's what I'm talking about.

Steve Wozniak:
Come on, I can't eat like you do. Eatin' fruit all the time? That's weird.

Steve Jobs:
It's not weird. It's pure.

Steve Wozniak:
Where's your beard?

Steve Jobs:
In the bathroom sink. I shaved it off.

Steve Wozniak:
Well, how come?

Steve Jobs:
'Cause banks don't like beards.

Steve Jobs:
What, like I have to have a moustache?

Steve Wozniak:
A suit! You actually bought a suit!

Steve Jobs:
You're stealing from me!