Recruit

James Clayton:
Everything is a test!

Walter Burke:
I pity da fool!

Walter Burke:
Nothing... is... what it seems.

James Clayton:
All I know about the CIA is that they're a bunch of fat, old white guys who fell asleep when we needed them most.

Walter Burke:
You gotta give me one thing. I'm a scary judge of talent.

James Clayton:
Would I have to kill anyone?

Walter Burke:
Would you like to?

Walter Burke:
All right, your objective - reach the parking lot with an asset who intends to have sex with you.

James Clayton:
You want us to pick up a girl?

Walter Burke:
Well, uh, five, actually - one each.

Psychiatrist #1:
Would you consider yourself subjectively firm or objectively flexible?

James Clayton:
Metaphysically wrinkle-free?

Walter Burke:
My dick's on fire!

Husky Guy:
What are the names of your instructors?

James Clayton:
Ok, ok. John's the wise guy. Paul's the cute one. George is pretty quiet, and this new kid... I can't remember his name.

James Clayton:
Upset.

Walter Burke:
Very dramatic, James.

James Clayton:
I want to talk, can we talk?

Walter Burke:
Yeah.

James Clayton:
Where are you?

Walter Burke:
Well, you know the phone booth you're calling from?

James Clayton:
Yeah.

Walter Burke:
Turn around.

James Clayton:
The Iwo Jima Memorial... this where you tell me about duty and sacrafice?

Walter Burke:
No. This is where I have my breakfast burrito.

James Clayton:
You said you wanted to go home and have comfort sex. Did you?

Walter Burke:
What do you know about the CIA?

James Clayton:
All I know is they're a bunch of old fat white guys who fell asleep when this country needed them most.

James Clayton:
Ever since we met we've been lying to each other. Now there's no reason to believe any of it is true, but I'm gonna anyway, okay?

James Clayton:
Tell me about my father.

Walter Burke:
You already know, don't you? That's why you're sitting here. You want answers, you're in the wrong car, kid. I only have secrets.

Walter Burke:
There's this parish priest and he goes before the Pope weeping and begging for forgiveness. What am I to do, oh what am I to do I do not believe in God anymore and you know what the pope said... fake it.

Walter Burke:
Let's break up this dance team!

James Clayton:
I guess it's just me and Sonny Crocket.

Ronnie Gibson:
Is that the black guy or the white guy?

James Clayton:
We're not playing by the rules here at the farm. Are we? Are we? Sonny?