Rehearsal for Murder

Ernie:
Some of those junkies and winos from Broadway, they try to bed down in the lobby overnight.

Alex:
Encourage them, Ernie. The theater was meant for the common man.

David:
Wonderful! Broadway's favorite actor gets pneumonia! Oh, well, after those notices, I suppose I could use a cold shower.

David:
Don't be depressed then, Alex! You've got worse things coming! Like marriage!

Alex:
It's essential they stay here, all of them. If even one of them walks out, it won't work.

Frank Heller:
It may not work anyway.

Alex:
You still think this is a mistake, don't you?

Frank Heller:
Like I said before, Mr. Dennison; this is your show. I'm just here to watch.

Karen:
Who's that?

Walter:
Tweedledum and Tweedledee. Bumped into each other outside.

Lloyd:
The difference is that Walter came in a limo and I had to take a bus.

Karen:
You're being obsequious, Leo.

Leo:
Okay, I'll stop if you tell me what it means.

Alex:
Oh and by the way, it's something new for me; a mystery.

Walter:
Good. They do well.

Alex:
Unusual form, a mystery. You take the audience by the hand, and you lead them...in the wrong direction. They trust you, and you betray them! All in the name of surprise.

Lloyd:
What are you going for? What's the point of the scene?

Alex:
Well, the point, Lloyd, is that in a mystery, everyone must have a motive.

Walter:
Alex, we've known each other for a long time, so I'm entitled to be blunt. Why are we here?

Alex:
You know why, Walter. To read my new play.

Walter:
It's not a play. It's just a bunch of unrelated scenes, all of them uncomfortably close to the truth.

David:
The hell they are!

Alex:
Might as well get to the point. Well, it's really very simple. When we finish here, we'll know something we didn't know before.

David:
And what's that?

Alex:
Which one of you killed Monica Welles.

Walter:
The woman killed herself! Do you understand? Whether you want to believe it or not, she was depressed, and she jumped out of her bedroom window!

Alex:
How can you be so certain, Walter? Were you there?!

Alex:
Permit me my element of surprise, Lloyd. In a mystery, the audience should never know what's coming next.

Lloyd:
He certainly raked you over the coals.

Walter:
Well, that makes two of us.

David:
Three.

Leo:
Great. Marvelous. Wonderful.

Leo:
We're next!

Alex:
Surely you don't want to miss the ending.

Lloyd:
Now I get it. Don't you see what he's doing?

Leo:
Now that you mention it...no.

Walter:
Well, now what?

Alex:
Alibis, Walter.

Walter:
I was wondering when you would get around to that.

Alex:
I've established that you all had motives...

David:
Like hell we had.

Alex:
But motives are nullified by a legitimate alibi.

Walter:
We all said a lot of things. None of them were true.