Republic of Doyle

Jake Doyle:
We're not listening to you 'cause you tells lies.

Malachy Doyle:
You nearly killed the both of ye!

Jake Doyle:
I'd ask you to come down and help me, but of course you'll never get your walker down here.

Malachy Doyle:
Could we have a look at the surveillance footage?

Jake Doyle:
For this day?

Registation Sign-In Guard:
[pause] What are you on, glue?

Malachy Doyle:
[pause] Maybe not.

Jake Doyle:
Thanks Reg, for your help!

Registation Sign-In Guard:
[to Jake] Doyle? Next time I see you at the Goulds Track, walk the other way.

Jake Doyle:
How was jail fadder?

Malachy Doyle:
Dandy, they're talking about naming a wing after you.

[about 709Click]

Tinny Doyle:
Bunch of skeets from the gut trying to be gangsta.

Des Courtney:
This is like camping!

Jake Doyle:
Des, can you try not to act like such a weirdo for five minutes?

[to 'Wigs Dinner' after she's found selling cocaine]

Tinny Doyle:
I bet you'd be scared of the Bay Girls locked up in juvy. Bet they got a healthy appetite for the Wigs Dinner.

Martin Poole:
Okay, its official, I'm aroused.

Rose Miller:
Really? I don't see anything.

Des Courtney:
Tick Tock of Death... man, out of the five books of yours that I read, that one was the gear sauce.

Garrison Steele:
My editor suggested Newfoundland. The seafood seems passable and you speak... something... like... English.

Garrison Steele:
You're far too immature for a relationship!

Jake Doyle:
...Hack!

Leslie Bennett:
Doyle, you're at the site of a homicide. Stop hittin' on me!

Jake Doyle:
I'm not hittin' on ya, it's a compliment!

Garrison Steele:
Desmond packed me a lunch.

Jake Doyle:
Wha... He didn't pack me a lunch.

Garrison Steele:
Obviously he likes me better.

Garrison Steele:
I'm telling you, its the jealous boyfriend. He has motive, he has lust...

Jake Doyle:
He has asthma.

Garrison Steele:
He's special... this hero.

Jake Doyle:
[touched, assumes he means him] That right?

Garrison Steele:
No, I mean special. He's mentally retarded.

Garrison Steele:
Do you know why I get so many women?

Jake Doyle:
[pause] Lemon gin?

Tinny Doyle:
Des, you can read *and* count to five!

Jake Doyle:
They were drilling the same woman... why not the same oil patch?

Des Courtney:
One day, he found that his sister... was his mudder. Burnt.

Jake Doyle:
Why is it every time you talk I get the urge to punch you in the face?

Des Courtney:
...cause you're mean?

Jake Doyle:
It's gonna be hard to divide $50 between three people.

Malachy Doyle:
I told you, 'trees' are in the garden. It's one, two, three!

Leslie Bennett:
Don't be talking about offing yourself Doyle. Get a girl all excited.

Des Courtney:
Oh, yeah a bastard child. I was one o'dem.

Jake Doyle:
I know a couple of b'ys in the Goulds that'll take care of this real quick like. They might even pay me for the opportunity.

Jake Doyle:
What do you really want?

Shamrock Tough:
What I always wanted Jake. The Airport Heights.

Jake Doyle:
Don't worry about it, it was Des' idea, and he's like... 9 tenths retard.

Malachy Doyle:
What brings you to St. John's?

Martin Poole:
The cod tongues.

Martin Poole:
I got all mixed around in your pretty little streets here.

Martin Poole:
There seem to be two kinds of people in Newfin... how do you say it?

Malachy Doyle:
Newfoundland!

I don't know what I've had done if anything had happened to you.