Return to House on Haunted Hill

Kyle:
Pretty creepy, isn't it? You know, they say that the souls of the people that died here apparently still haunt the house.

Michelle:
You know, they also say that people who believe in ghost should be on Prozac.

Kyle:
I'm sorry, Michelle, I wasn't listening, I was looking at your breasts.

Desmond:
Mansions with their own mental wards. Only in f***ing L.A.

Ariel Wolfe:
The house is gonna do everything in its power to stop us.

Kyle:
Of course. Because that's what houses do.

Michelle:
How hard can it be to find a goddamn crematorium? It's on the map, isn't it?

Desmond:
I'll get us there.

Michelle:
You mean if the house doesn't get us first.

Paul:
[reading the newspaper reports on Sara's wall] Isn't this the house where all those people died a few years ago?

Ariel Wolfe:
Yeah, my sister was one of the few that made it out alive.

Paul:
I remember seeing it on the news. Steven Price flipped out, went on a killing spree.

Ariel Wolfe:
Well, that's not what happened according to my sister.

Paul:
What do you mean?

Ariel Wolfe:
Sara believed the house was haunted, that ghosts killed Price's party guests.

Michelle:
[Michelle is at Dr. Hammer's book signing] So, what's a girl gotta do to get your autograph?

[Cut to Michelle and Dr. Hammer having sex in his office]

Michelle:
[Kyle walks in on Michelle and Dr. Hammer having sex] Dude! Can you knock?

Kyle:
Someone's working 'hard' on their Ph.D.

Michelle:
F*** you, Kyle!