Shivering Sherlocks

Police Officer Jackson:
[the police officer hears a sound coming from a trash can] Who's in that can?

Shemp Howard:
Just garbage! [Slap] Oh!

Captain Mullins:
[the captian tries the lie detector on Shemp] Now then, I gotta a couple of questions I wanna ask you!

Shemp Howard:
Me?

Moe Howard:
Yes, and so of I. Did you or did not take that quarter out of my shoe last night?

Shemp Howard:
On my honor, Moe I didn't do it. [the alarm goes off]

Larry Fine:
What will it be, sir?

Customer:
I'll take the short ribs.

Larry Fine:
I think we got some delicious chicken soup.

Customer:
Just short ribs.

Larry Fine:
I know but you haven't tried our chicken soup I know because I...

Customer:
[Grabs Larry by the collar] Short ribs!

Customer:
Short ribs. Chicken soup comin' up!

[the Stooges are looking for something to pry open a locked door]

Larry Fine:
[holding a crowbar] You think this'll open it?

Moe Howard:
[taking crowbar] Swell. Where'd you get it?

Larry Fine:
In the house.

Moe Howard:
Oh...

[Moe turns around and realizes the door is open]

Moe Howard:
In the house?

Larry Fine:
Yeah. Can you use it?

Moe Howard:
And how.

[Moe bonks Larry on the head with the crowbar]