Sling Blade

Frank:
Ever think of killing yourself on purpose like my daddy done?

Karl:
I studied about it. The Bible says you ought not to. It says if you do that, you go off to Hades. Some folks call it Hell, I call it Hades.

Karl:
Reckon what you is wanting to know is what I'm a-doing in here. 'Reckon the reason I'm in here is 'cause I've killed somebody. But I reckon what you is wanting to know is how come me had killed somebody so I reckon I'll start at the front and tell ye. I lived out back of my mother and father's place, most of my life, in a little ol' shed that my daddy built for me. They didn't too much want me up there in the house with the rest of'em. Mmm. So mostly I just sat around out there in the shed lookin' at the ground. Mmm. I didn't have no floor out there but I had me a hole dug out to lay down in. 'Quilt or two to put down there. Mmm-hmm. My father was a hard working man most of his life, not that I can say the same for myself. I mostly just sat around out there in the shed, tinkering around with a lawn mower or two. Went to school off and on from time to time. But the children out there, they were very cruel to me. Made quite a bit of sport of me, made fun of me quite a bit. So mostly, I just sat around out there in the shed. My daddy worked down there at the sawmill, down at the planer mill for an old man named Dixon. Ol' Man Dixon was a very cruel fella, didn't treat his employees very well. Didn't pay'em too much of a wage, didn't pay my daddy too much of a wage. Just barely enough to get by on, I reckon. Mmm. I reckon he got by alright. Mmm. They used to come out, one or the other, usually my mother and feed me pretty regular. Mmm-hmm. So I know he made enough to where I could have mustard and biscuits three or four times a week. Mmm. But Ol' Man Dixon, he had a boy by the name of Jesse Dixon. Jesse was really more cruel than his daddy was. He used to make quite a bit of sport of me when I'd be down there at the schoolhouse. 'Used to take advantage of little girls there in the neighborhood and all. Mmm. They used to say that my mother was a very pretty woman. They said that quite a bit from time to time when I'd be down there at the schoolhouse. Well, I reckon you want me to get on with it and tell you what happened so I reckon I'll tell ye. I was sitting out there in the shed one evening not doing too much of nothing, just kindly staring at the wall. I was waiting on my mother to come out and give me my Bible lesson. Well I heared a commotion up there in the house, so I run up on the screened in porch to see what was a-going on. I looked in the window there and I seen my mother laying there on the floor without any clothes on. Mmm. Mmm-hmm. I seen Jesse Dixon laying on top of her. He was having his way with her. Mmm. Well I just seen red. I picked up a kaiser blade that was sitting there by the screen door. Some folks call it a sling blade, I call it a kaiser blade. Got a long wood handle kinda like an ax handle with a long blade on it shaped kinda like a banana. Sharp on one edge and dull on the other'n. It's what the highway boys used to cut down weeds and whatnot. Well I went in the house and I hit Jesse Dixon upside the head with it, knocked him off my mother. I reckon that didn't quite satisfy me, so I hit him again with it in the neck with the sharp edge and just plumb near cut his head off. Killed'im. My mother jumped up from there and started hollering, "What'd you kill Jesse for?" "What'd you kill Jesse for?" Well, mmm, come to find out I don't reckon my mother minded what Jesse was doing to her. 'Reckon that made me madder than what Jesse'd made me, so I takened the kaiser blade, some folks called it a sling blade, I called it a kaiser blade, mmm, and I hit my mother upside the head with it. Mmm... Killed her; Some folks has asked me if I had it to do over again, would I do it the same way. I reckon I would. Anyhow they seen fit to put me in here and here I've been a great long while. I've learned to read some. 'Took me four years to read the Bible. I reckon I understand a great deal of it. Wasn't what I expected in some places. Mmm. I slept in a good bed for a great long while. Now they've seen fit to put me out of here. They say they're setting me free today. Mmm.

Karl:
No, Sir, not yet.

Karl:
Quite a spell, I reckon.

Frank:
I'd like to kill that son-of-a-b*tch. I hate him.

Karl:
You ought not talk that way. You just a boy.

Doyle:
Hey is this the kind of retard that drools and rubs sh*t in his hair and all that, 'cause I'm gonna have a hard time eatin' 'round that kind of thing now. Just like I am with antique furniture and midgets. You know that, I can't so much as drink a damn glass of water around a midget or a piece of antique furniture.

Linda:
Doyle, you're awful. You shouldn't be that way.

Doyle:
I ain't saying it's right, I'm just telling the damn truth. He'll make me sick. I know it.

Linda Wheatley:
I'm gonna make some coffee. Karl, you want some coffee?

Karl:
Coffee makes me nervous when I drink it. Mmm.

Linda Wheatley:
Karl, you know what? Melinda here was voted employee of the month at the dollar store last February. Isn't that something?

Karl:
Yes ma'am, I reckon.

Melinda:
Well, when you like pricing items as much as I do, it's just bound to happen sooner or later, I guess.

Terence:
We wrote one last night outside the mini mart. Morris called it "Stuart Drives A Comfortable Car" and then like in country songs, you know, in parentheses it says "There's Usually Someone in the Trunk." And, and um, I came up with a tune just a hummin'.

Doyle:
See, you don't want to question the genius, Vaughan. Morris here is a modern-day poet, kinda like in olden times.

Morris:
Yeah, I got a new tune in composition entitled "The Thrill." And it goes somethin' like this: "I stand on the hill, not for a thrill, but for the breath of a fresh kill. Never mind the man who contemplates doin' away with license plates. He stands alone, anyhow, bakin' the cookies of discontent by the heat of the laundromat vent. Leavin' his soul!" Then like in poetry I go dot-dot-dot, you know, kinda off center, then I drop down and then I go: "Leavin' his soul! And partin' the waters of the medulla oblongata of - -brrrrrr! - -mankind!" That was a damn good song, wasn't it Doyle?

Doyle:
What am I supposed to do about supper while you're out runnin' around with that fag?

Linda:
You're not crippled, get in there and make it yourself.

Doyle:
Talkin' back and everything. That kinda makes me horny, Linda.

Linda:
Frank, maybe you better go play in your room if Doyle's gonna talk nasty.

Frank:
I don't wanna go play in my room.

Doyle:
He don't wanna go play in his room. Let's all just sit here and be a family. Until your mentally retarded friend and your homosexual friend get here.

Doyle:
Linda, go get my guitar. It's out there with that looney toon.

Karl:
I don't reckon you have to go with women to be a good father to a boy. You been real square-dealin' with me. The Bible says two men ought not lay together. But I don't reckon the Good Lord would send anybody like you to Hades. That Frank, he lives inside of his own heart. That's an awful big place to live in. You take good care of that boy.

Vaughan Cunningham:
I will. Karl?

Karl:
I reckon I'm gonna have to get used to looking at pretty people.

Dr. Jerry Woolridge:
Yes you will.

Karl:
'Reckon I'm gonna have to get used to them looking at me.

Vaughan Cunningham:
You always seem to be deep in thought. Tell me, what are you thinking right now?

Karl:
I was thinkin', I'm gonna take me some of these taters home with me.

Vaughan Cunningham:
How about before that?

Karl:
Well, let me think... I was thinkin' I could use me another couple cans'o that potted meat if ya got any extree.

Marsha Dwiggins:
Will you ever kill anyone again, Karl?

Karl:
I don't reckon I got no reason to kill nobody. Mmm.

Doyle:
What in the hell are you doing with that lawn mower blade?

Karl:
I aim to kill you with it. Mmm.

Charles Bushman:
Now... On the third day, I washed her. She wasn't too clean. I got all the right spots. She's the only one I kept for a certain ammount of time, because I got a real short attention span. Now, I can't say she enjoyed her stay, but that washcloth I put in her mouth and held it there with a big piece of duct tape kept all her complaining to a min... I don't like people who talk all the time. I like to do all the talking, which is why I think I'm so fond of you, 'cause you're so easy-going. Although I do sense a little tension in you from time to time. So, you were out in the world, huh? What was it like?

Karl:
It was too big.

Charles Bushman:
Not too big in here, is it?

Doyle:
Frank's a weak little kid. His daddy taught him how to be a p*ssy.

Frank:
Stop it, Doyle! Don't talk about my daddy.

Doyle:
"Don't talk about my daddy". Go on and get up outta here. Go out to the garage and let me be. Go on now, get!

Doyle:
Hey! HEY!

Doyle:
I told you three times already, the law's on my side! I play cards with J.D. Shelnut, chief of PO-lice! So kiss my ass, you old bastard!

Charles Bushman:
A Mercury is a good car. That's the car I was driving that day. I've had a lot of cars. Different kinds. Lot's of different kinds of cars. She was standing - this girl - on the side of the street where there was this chicken stand, wasn't the Colonel but it was a chicken stand nonetheless. I pulled the Mercury up right along side her and rolled down the window, see, by electric power. She had on a leather skirt and had a lot of hair on her arms. I like that a lot. That means a big bush. I like a big bush. She says, "Are you dating?" You know, so I said, "Sure". She gets in and we pull off to a remote location that was comfortable for both she and I. She says, "How much do you wanna spend?", I said, "Whatever it will take to see that bush of yours because I know it's a big one". She says, "Twenty five dollars". That's not chicken feed to a working man so I produce the $25, she puts it in her shoe, pulls up her skirt and there before me lay this thin, crooked, uncircumcised penis.

Charles Bushman:
You can imagine how bad I wanted my $25 back, huh?

Charles Bushman:
You gotta make something explode to really understand it. You gotta examine all those tiny particles while they're still on fire.

Doyle:
Your buddy Karl here is going. We can't be no normal family with him living in the garage and comin' in the damn bedroom at 4:00 in the morning, carryin' hammers and sh*t.

Doyle:
Now get the f*** out now before I get too mad to turn back!

Terence:
What about our instruments?

Doyle:
Come here, you little prick. Come here, you little f***ing prick!

Doyle:
Get out! All y'all, get the f*** out! Come on, you motherf***ers!

Doyle:
Get the f*** out! Randy, you tuning son of a b*tch, go f***ing practice, Randy!

Doyle:
Come on, Morris, you f***ing genius, get the f*** up and get the f*** out of here, Goddammit!

Karl:
Just 'cause I ain't gonna be around no more, maybe, don't mean that I don't care for you.

Frank:
I care 'bout you too, but you'll be around. Don't say that.

Karl:
Doesn't matter where I was to be. We'll always be friends. You and me made friends right off the bat. Don't nobody ever change that. I kindly want to put my arm around you, then I'm gonna get up out of here and leave.

Karl:
I love you, boy.

Doyle:
I don't like homosexuals and she goes out and buddies up with one so I gotta deal with that. I don't like little wimpy-ass kids or mental retards and she got one of each livin' with her.

Doyle:
I'm just kidding about that really.

Doyle:
To call the police, you push 911 then just tell 'em to bring an ambulance, or a "hearst" if you're gonna kill me.

Karl:
There were these two fellars standin' on a bridge, a-goin' to the bathroom. One fellar said, "The water's cold" and the other fellar said, "The water's deep". I believe one fella come from Arkansas. Get it?

Bill Cox:
Hey Scooter, did I tell you the one about the two ol' boys pissing off a bridge?

Scooter:
I don't reckon so.

Bill Cox:
Well there were these two ol' boys and they hung their peckers off a bridge to piss. One ol' boy come from California, the other come from Arkansas. The ol' boy from California says, "Boy, this water's cold", and the ol' boy from Arkansas says, "Yeah and it's deep too".

Vaughan Cunningham:
I don't understand.

Morris:
Exactly the point, my young level-headed friend.

Vaughan Cunningham:
I don't get it.

Morris:
Well, I rest my case.

Doyle:
Believe in the Bible, do ya Karl?

Karl:
I don't understand all of it, but I reckon I understand a good deal of it.

Doyle:
Well I can't understand none of it. This one begat that one and that one begat this one, and lo and behold someone says some sh*t to someone else - just how retarded are you?

Karl:
There was a boy. We made friends.

Charles Bushman:
Ha ha, I'll bet you did. 'Course I was never bent that way, I was always bent the other way.

Charles Bushman:
A shovel just makes too much goddamned racket.

Linda:
Frank's always after a father figure and Doyle ain't one with his mean ass.

Vaughan Cunningham:
What about me?

Linda:
Frank doesn't really see you as a guy-guy.

Vaughan Cunningham:
Oh and Karl's a guy-guy?

Charles Bushman:
There was a young man by the name of John Leggit Hunter who ran a filling station business, a good filling station business and he's one of these young men we meet in life, I'm sure you've met some like him, who did not deserve what he had and what he had was a beautiful young bride named Sarah. She was a Georgia peach. In fact, she was the picture I had in my mind of the perfect woman so I took it upon myself to take her away from John Leggit Hunter who did not deserve her. Oh, I don't know if I mentioned this but he was a Frenchman who claimed to be an Englishman. It took a lot of strong nylon cord to get her away from him because she was a fighter as well as being a Georgia peach.

Doyle:
I don't mean to be so... Assholish I guess is a good word for it.

Frank:
Mama's got a boyfriend now. His name is Doyle Hargraves. He works construction so he makes a pretty good living, but he don't help Mama out with any money though. He ain't no good. He's mean to her. He don't like me at all. Mama says it's 'cause he's jealous that I belong to my Daddy instead of him. He spends the night at our house sometimes and he's got his own house, somebody told me it's where he can have more girlfriends. I like it on the nights he ain't at our house. I ain't so nervous then.

Karl:
How come her still being girlfriends and all with him if he's mean to her?

Frank:
She says it's for the times he's good to her. She's lonely since Daddy died, sometimes she says she don't know why. He threatened to kill her if she ever left him. My daddy would kill him if he were still here and somebody was mean to Mama. Vaughan, he's real good to Mama. Vaughan that you met. But he's not able to do anything to Doyle. He's funny, you know. Not funny "Ha-Ha", funny queer. He likes to go with men instead of women. That makes him not able to fight too good. He sure is nice, though. He's from St. Louis, people who are queer get along better in a big town. I wish he liked to go with women, I'd rather he be Mama's boyfriend than Doyle.

Mrs. Woolridge:
Karl, I hear Jerry's taking you somewhere else tomorrow.

Karl:
I don't reckon I know nobody named Jerry.

Dr. Jerry Woolridge:
She's talking about me, Karl, that's my first name.

Karl:
He's carrying me to look for work over in Millsburg where I's borned.

Doyle:
Hey! I said get out of my house! That goes for cocksuckers and retards!

Linda:
This is not your house, Doyle. This is my house and I decide who goes and who stays. You got a house, why don't you get some of your girlfriends and go home to it?

Doyle:
You know better than to talk to me like that when I'm hurtin', Linda. Don't make me knock the piss outta you.

Doyle:
That's funny, Vaughan. Linda, go to bed and take little snot-nose here with you.

Linda:
You're not staying here tonight. Go get sober before you come back, I'm tired of my child seeing this. Now you get your ass straight or I'll lock your ass out of my life for good.

Doyle:
If you even think about leaving me, Linda, I told you: I'm gonna kill you deader than a door nail.

Linda:
That might be better than this.

Doyle:
Was you in the nut house for hackin' somebody up with a hatchet?

Karl:
I never used no hatchet that I remember. Mmm.

Doyle:
So you're just crazy in a retard kind of way, huh? Wouldn't matter to me if you did do violence on someone. I ain't scared of sh*t. You're just a humped-over retard, seems to me. I'm just kiddin'. Welcome to our humble home, Buddy.

Morris:
Dots look good on paper. You don't sing them anyway, you're just showing your true Aries color.

Doyle:
Stay out of my goddam face, you f***ing buzzard!

Karl:
Reckon what you like to eat in there?

Frosty Cream Employee:
Well, the French fries are pretty good.

Karl:
French fried potaters?

Frosty Cream Employee:
Yeah, French fries. They're .60 for medium and .75 for large.

Karl:
'Reckon I'll have me some of the big 'uns.

Doyle:
I'm gonna call up Morris and get the band together. We're gonna have a party. Party our asses off. I'd love to show them that Karl. They'd get a real kick out of him.

Frank:
Last time you got angry and ran Morris and them off and told them to stay away from here.

Doyle:
That ain't none of your damn business, besides, that's the way friends do one another! F*** it, I'm calling them up.

Vaughan Cunningham:
Please don't tell anybody at the store that Albert was here. You know how this town is. Everybody spreads cruel rumors.

Melinda:
You mean about you and Albert being that way...? I think everybody at the store already knows about it. Maureen Ledbetter told the most awful story about why you ain't allowed at the First Baptist Church no more.

Karl:
I don't think anything bad ought to happen to children. I think the bad stuff should be saved up for the people whose grown up. That's the way I see it.

Melinda:
Hi, Karl, I'm on my lunch break. I got you these flowers that were on sale, cause they're not fresh. $2.99, plus by 10% employee discount, since I didn't bring you anything on our date last night. Well, I just thought I'd bring them to you. I enjoyed walking with you. I got a blister the size of a quarter on my heel. Well, see you some time I guess.

Karl:
Blisters sure can hurt.

Charles Bushman:
Karl, who'd you kill? Was it the boy?

Karl:
Don't you say another word about that boy. Fact'o business, don't you say another word to me. I ain't listening to you no more.

Doyle:
Hey Vaughan, I heard you been putting it on ol' Albert Sellers who works over at the funeral home.

Vaughan Cunningham:
I know Albert. We're friends.

Doyle:
No, I heard you're more than friends. I heard Dick Rivers caught the two of you bowled up and going at it in the same room with poor Miss Ogletree dead as a doornail laid out on a gurney.

Vaughan Cunningham:
That is a total lie.

Monty Johnson:
This ain't right, Doyle. There IS something wrong with you.

Doyle:
Get the f*** out!

Monty Johnson:
Nobody wants to take this SH*T, Man!

Doyle:
I don't guess I give a sh*t. I ain't here that much so if you want a retard living out in the garage, I guess that's your business. But I do got some tools and a set of socket wreches out there I'd rather not have stolen.

Frank:
He's real honest. He wouldn't steal nothing.

Doyle:
Frankie, I wasn't talking to you, now was I? I was talking to your Mama. It's her decision, not yours. If I let it go on it's because she said so, not you!

Doyle:
What's in the bag?

Karl:
This'n that. Tooth paste and whatnot.

Doyle:
What's all them books?

Karl:
Different ones. One of 'em is the Bible.

Dr. Jerry Woolridge:
I won't lie to you. He did get into that trouble a while ago.

Bill Cox:
I remember well. He cut those folks to pieces and his Mama was one of them.

Scooter:
And that old Dixon boy. Oh hell, I always wanted to kill him myself. A**hole's what he was.

Dr. Jerry Woolridge:
You sleep with your mama tonight. I'm gonna sleep with your brother so Karl can have your room.

Dr. Jerry Woolridge:
'Cause he's company.

Doyle:
If y'all don't shut up, I'm gonna go out of my mind. Besides, Karl here is liable to bust his spring. He's already off balance.

Vaughan Cunningham:
Listen, everyone, I've had a few glasses of wine and that tends to make me emotional. It came over me in a rush. I just want you to know that I care about each and every person at this table.

Linda:
Thank you, Vaughan. We care about you too, don't we?

Karl:
Yes, Sir.

Marsha Dwiggins:
Where will he go?

Dr. Jerry Woolridge:
I think he's going back to Millsburg.

Marsha Dwiggins:
Will he be supervised?

Dr. Jerry Woolridge:
About as much as everyone else, I guess.

Karl:
I'm your boy.

Frank Childers:
I ain't got no boy.

Karl:
I'm your oldest boy. Name of Karl.

Frank Childers:
I ain't got no boy.

Karl:
They turned me loose from the nervous hospital. 'Said I was well. I got hired on by a Mr. Bill Cox fixing lawnmowers and whatnot. That grass out there in the yard has grown up quite a bit. I reckon I might cut it for you.

Frank Childers:
I'd kick your head in 25 years ago, but you're dead, I guess. Where'd you go to?

Terence:
I don't think that's right. I believe the "Dot Dot Dot" come between "Medula" and "Oblongota".

Terence:
Well it did!

Morris:
The dots are where I say they are. Melody and tune, that's your trade, Terence.

Frank:
You ever have any brothers or sisters growing up?

Karl Childers:
I had one there for a little while. But, uh, it didn't get old enough for me to play with it.

Frank:
Why not? It die?

Karl Childers:
Yes, Sir.

Frank:
Why?

Karl Childers:
It got born too early. My mother and father made it come out too early some how or other.

Frank:
So it died when it came out?

Karl Childers:
My daddy came out to the shed and got me. He said, "Here, take this and throw it away", and he handed me a towel with something or another in it. Well I started for that barrel and I opened up the towel 'cause there was a noise. Something a-moving around in there. The towel was all bloody-like all aorund it there. It was a lil' ol' baby not no bigger than a squirrel.

Frank:
A girl or a boy?

Karl Childers:
It was a little ol' boy.

Frank:
You threw it in the trash barrel?

Karl Childers:
Well that didn't seem right to me, so I went in the shed and got me a shoe box and emptied out all the washers and nuts and screws that were in it and I takened the little fellar and put him inside the box and buried him right there in a corner of the yard. That seemed more proper to me, I reckon.

Frank:
Was it still alive when you buried it?

Karl Childers:
I heared it a-cryin' through that box.

Frank:
That don't seem right. Seems like you would have kept him and taken care of him if he was your brother.

Karl Childers:
I wasn't but 6 or 8. I don't reckon I knew what to do. I didn't know how to care for no baby. My mother and father didn't want him and they learned me to do what they told me. These days I reckon it's better to give him back to the Good Lord anyhow.

Linda:
Please, Doyle, not tonight. They always stay until morning, I'll just give out.

Doyle:
You ain't gotta do nothing, Linda. Just put some chips in a bowl and run ice out to us when we look low.

Bill Cox:
How are you coming along with that garden tiller?

Karl:
I fixed it. It's workin' pretty good now.

Bill Cox:
You done fixed it? Well I'll be damned. Scooter told me it couldn't be fixed. 'Course Scooter is about as shiftless as one poor son of a b*tch can be. You done fixed it. I'll just be damned.

Some calls it a sling blade I calls it a Kaizer blade

Frank Childers:
I told you I ain't got no boy, now why don't you get on outta here and let me be. You ain't no kin to me.

Karl:
[after a pause] I learned to read some. I read the Bible quite a bit. I can't understand all of it, but I reckon I understand a good deal of it. Them stories you and Mama told me ain't in there. You ought not done that to your boy. I studied on killing you. Studied on it quite a bit. But I reckon there ain't no need for it if all you're gonna do is sit there in that chair. You'll be dead soon enough and the world 'll be shut of ya. You ought not killed my little brother, he should've had a chance to grow up. He woulda had fun some time.

Frosty Cream Boy:
Can I help you, sir? Can I help you, sir?!

Karl:
I was kinda wantin' something to eat, mmm-hmm.

Frosty Cream Boy:
Well, um, what would you like?

Karl:
You got any biscuits for sale in there?

Frosty Cream Boy:
No, this is a Frosty Cream. We don't serve biscuits. But we got a lot of other stuff, though.

Karl:
What you got in there that's good to eat?

Frosty Cream Boy:
Well, we got Big Chief burgers, Bongo burgers, foot longs, corny dogs, Frosty shakes, creamy bars. Uh, did you want me to go through the whole list?

Karl:
Reckon what do you like to eat in there?

Frosty Cream Boy:
Well, the french fries are pretty good.

Karl:
French fried potaters?

Frosty Cream Boy:
Yup, the french fries.

Karl:
How much you want for 'em?

Frosty Cream Boy:
They're .60 for the medium and .75 for the large.

Karl:
I reckon I'll have me some of the big uns.

Frosty Cream Boy:
So one large french fries?

Karl:

Well I reckon what you was wanting to know is what I'm a-doing in here. I reckon the reason I'm in here is 'cause I've killed somebody.mmm hmm But I reckon what you was wanting to know is how come me to kill somebody so I reckon I'll start at the front and tell ye.

I lived out back of my mother and father's place, most of my life, in a little ol' shed that my daddy’d built for me. They didn't too much want me up there in the house with the rest of 'em. Mmm. So mostly I just sat around out there in the shed a-lookin' at the ground. Mmm. I didn't have no floor out there but I had me a hole dug out to lay down in. 'Quilt or two to put down there. Mmm-hmm. My father, was a hard working man most of his life, not that I can say the same for myself. I mostly just sat around out there in the shed, tinkered around with a lawn mower or two. Went to school off and on from time to time. But the childern out there, they were very cruel to me, ‘n made quite a bit of sport of me, made fun of me quite a bit. So mostly, I just sat around out there, in the shed.

My daddy, worked down there at the sawmill, down at the planer mill for an old man named Dixon. Ol' Man Dixon was a very cruel feller, didn't treat his employees very well. Didn't pay'em too much of a wage, didn't pay my daddy too much of a wage. Just barely enough to get by on, I reckon. Mmm. But I reckon he got by alright. Mmm. They used to come out, one or the other of ‘em, usually my mother, ‘n feed me pretty regular. Mmm-hmm. So I know he made enough to where I could have mustard and biscuits three or four times a week. Mmm, hm. But Ol' Man Dixon, he had a boy, name of Jesse Dixon. Jesse was really more cruel than his daddy was. He used to make quite a bit of sport of me when I'as down there at the schoolhouse. Used to take advantage of little girls there in the neighborhood and all. Mmm. He used to say, that my mother was a very pretty woman. He said that quite a bit from time to time when I'd be down there at the schoolhouse.

Well, I reckon you want me to get on with it and tell you what happened so I reckon I'll tell ye. I was sitting out there in the shed one evening not doing too much of nothing, just kindly staring at the wall. Mmm. Waiting on my mother to come out and give me my Bible lesson. Mmhm Well I heared a commotion up there in the house, so I run up on the screened in porch to see what was a-going on. I looked in the window there and I seen my mother a-laying there on the floor without any clothes on. Mmm. Mmm-hmm. I seen Jesse Dixon a-laying on top of her. hmmm He was a-having his way with her. Mmm. Well I just seen red. mmm I picked up a kaiser blade that was sitting there by the screen door. Some folks calls it a sling blade, I call it a kaiser blade. It’s kindly a long wood handle, kindly like an ax handle with a long blade on it shaped kindly like a bananer. Sharp on one edge and dull on the other'n. It's what the highway boys use to cut down weeds and what-not. Well I went in there in the house and I hit Jesse Dixon upside the head with it, knocked him off my mother. I reckon that didn't quite satisfy me, so I hit him again with it in the neck with the sharp edge and just plumb near cut his head off.m Killed him.

My mother, she jumped up from there and started hollerin’, "What'd you kill Jesse fer?" "What'd you kill Jesse fer?" Well, mmm, come to find out I don't reckon my mother minded what Jesse was a-doing to her. I reckon that made me madder than what Jesse'd made me. So I taken the kaiser blade, some folks calls it a sling blade, I call it a kaiser blade, mmm, and I hit my mother upside the head with it. Mmmhmm... Killed her;

Some folks has asked me if you had it to do over again, would you do it the same way? I reckon I would. Anyhow they seen fit to put me in here and here I been for a great long while. I've learned to read some. Took me four years to read the Bible. I reckon I understand a great deal of it. Wasn't what I expected in some places. Mmm. I slept in a good bed for a great long while. Now they've seen fit to put me out of here. They say they're a-setting me free today. Mmm.

Anyhow, I reckon that’s all you was needin’ to know. If you want to hear about more details, I reckon I can tell ’em to ye. I don’t know whether or not that’s enough for your newspaper or not

Doyle:
"What y'all doin' with that lawnmower blade anyway"?

Karl :
" I am ta kill yew with it"

Karl Childers:
I like them French fried potaters.

Karl Childers:
[on the phone] Yes, ma'am. I've killed Doyle Hargraves with a lawnmower blade. Yes, ma'am, I'm right sure of it. I hit him two good whacks in the head with it. That second one just plum near cut his head in two... It's a lil' ol' white house on the corner of Vine Street and some other street. There's a pick-up truck out front that says "Doyle Hargraves Construction" on it. Doyle said besides sending the police, you might wanna send an ambulance or a "hearst". I'll be sitting here, waiting on ye.

Doyle Hargraves:
Not that you two afflicted sumbitches know anything about this, but you're sitting in a crew cab dualie pickup. In some circles, this is considered a piece of automotive art.

Doyle Hargraves:
You believe in the bible do ya Karl?

Doyle Hargraves:
Well I can't understand none of it, this one begat this one, this one begat that one, begat, begat, lo and behold someone says some sh*t or another just how retarded are you?

Karl Childers:
Some folks call it a sling blade, I call it a kaiser blade. It's kindly a long wood handle, kinda like an axe handle, with a long blade on it shaped kindly like a bananer. Mmm hmm. Sharp on one edge, and dull on the other 'un. Mmm hmm. It's what the highway boys use to cut down weeds and what not, y'know.