Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Morgan:
Anyone want some pig?

Sheriff Hoyt:
I smell bullshit.

Morgan:
I'm sorry, but how often do girls blow their heads off in this shithole town.

Morgan:
Oh my god, I am WAY too stoned for this!

Andy:
Well I guess that's what brains look like... Sort of like... Lasagna... Kind of... Okay, I'll shut up now.

Sheriff Hoyt:
I bet she's real unhappy, real sorry that you're getting f***in' her blood all over your goddamn arm. You know, back when I was a young patrolman, I used to love wrapping up these young honies.

Andy:
Yeah, I bet you did.

Sheriff Hoyt:
Yeah, cop me a little bit of a feel every now and then, you know. Oh, look at that. She's kind of wet down there. What you boys been doing with this dead body anyway?

Andy:
Can we please finish this?

Sheriff Hoyt:
You know, I have just as much respect for dead as anybody.

Sheriff Hoyt:
Get that nasty, goddamn thing out of the backseat of my goddamn car. Put it in the trunk, what the hells the matter with you?

Old Monty:
I said she could call him, you wait outside

Kemper:
Okay, chief...

Old Monty:
I ain't lookin' for trouble!

Kemper:
Don't shoot!

Morgan:
I was like Erin don't drink the water down there...

Erin:
I didn't!

Kemper:
And she didn't drink the tequila, she didn't drink the weed, smoke the weed.

Pepper:
I don't know about you guys, but I happen to like my teeth right where they are.

Erin:
I didn't go to Mexico to watch you get sh*t-faced for four days.

Kemper:
That's what you do in Mexico!

Narrator:
The film which you are about to see is an account of the tragedy which befell a group of 5 youths. It is all the more tragic in that they were young. But had they lived very, very long lives, they could not have expected, nor would they have wished to see as much of the mad and macabre as they were to see that day. For them, an idyllic summer afternoon became a nightmare. For 30 years, the files collected dust in the cold-cases divison of the Travis County Police Department. Over 1,300 pieces of evidence were collected from the crime scene at the Hewitt residence. Yet none of the evidence was more compelling than the classified police footage of the crime-scene walk-through.

Narrator:
The events of that day were to lead to one of the most bizarre crimes in the annals of American history - the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

Kemper:
Morgan, how are you an expert on the dumbest sh*t?

Sheriff Hoyt:
Well, well, well. Look at we have here. We got ourselves a killer. Only this time, you killed the sheriff.

Andy:
Yo, Kemp, can you do something about the A.C. back here? I'm melting.

Kemper:
No. But if you or Pepper get too hot, you could always take your clothes off.

Andy:
You'd like that, wouldn't you?

Erin:
You are such a perv. Don't listen to him, Pepper.

Pepper:
Why not? I think he's funny.

Erin:
She's only known you for 19 hours. I've lived with him for 3 years, and trust me, he is not funny.

Kemper:
I've never seen anybody die before.

Morgan:
Yeah, most people never do.

Sheriff Hoyt:
How about giving me a hand here, a**hole? You don't expect me to do this by myself? I need some help.

Andy:
Why do I always get yanked into this sh*t? What am I doing?

Sheriff Hoyt:
Lift her up and just kind of pull her over your way there. She ain't gonna bite you. She's deader than a goddamn doornail. Get a-hold of her and pick her up.

Morgan:
What are we gonna do?

Kemper:
I don't know... uh... we gotta call the cops, I guess.

Morgan:
Um, yeah, on a list of bad ideas, that one goes, way up there. Oh, police officers, please, as you inspect a crime scene, which is now our van, please, ignore the colorful pinata, filled with marijuana, in case you happen to come across it, because it played no part, you know, whatsoever in the demise of this unfortunate, young, woman.

Pepper:
It just seems so wrong.

Sheriff Hoyt:
Don't give me any crap, young lady. Goddamn it, I got just as much respect for a dead body as anybody around here.

Old Monty:
What the hell are you doing in my house?

Andy:
All right, look. We're just looking for are friend, all right. Then we'll be out of here.

Old Monty:
You ain't running things, boy except your mouth.

Andy:
This guy's crazy.

Old Monty:
You little turd, you're so dead, you don't even know it.

Sheriff Hoyt:
Is that where she was sitting? Because the angle don't add up for me with the blood on that back window.

Morgan:
Maybe she was a bit more in the middle.

Sheriff Hoyt:
Well, maybe you ought to move a little more over to the middle.

Morgan:
But...

Sheriff Hoyt:
What, are you afraid of a little blood? Get the f*** over there!

Sheriff Hoyt:
You kids shouldn't have messed with that little girl. You brought this all on yourself.

Erin:
What's wrong with you f***ing people?

Sheriff Hoyt:
Nothing wrong with us.

Andy:
rin, I'm dead. Please finish it. You can do it.

Erin:
I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't.

Andy:
here's a knife. Erin, do it. Do it!

Erin:
I can't do it.

Andy:
Do it! Do it! Do it!

Erin:
Please forgive me. Please forgive me.

Narrator:
The crime scene was not properly secured by Travis County Police. Two investigating officers were fatally wounded that day. This is the only known image of Thomas Hewitt, the man they call Leatherface. The case today still remains open.