The Batman vs. Dracula

Alfred Pennyworth:
[to Dracula, aiming the vaccine] Bite this.

The Joker:
[a vampire, starved of blood] I thought you cared!

Batman:
Believe me, Joker, I'm trying to help you.

The Joker:
Then FEED ME!

[Spies a cockroach, and speedily gobbles it up]

The Joker:
Got ketchup?

Alfred Pennyworth:
[about Dracula's withered head] I'll be sweeping that into the dust pan, sir.

Oswald Cobblepot:
[Nervously watching Dracula drain the Joker of blood at dusk] Breakfast in bed... fresh-squeezed.

Oswald Cobblepot:
[to Dracula, regarding Vicky Vale] Oh, the girl... you HAVE been the grave for a while, haven't you, master? [Eyes her neck] Nice jugulars!

The Joker:
[to Batman, after being bitten by Dracula] You're the second batman I've met tonight, and you're both a pain in the neck.

The Penguin:
[getting arrested] It was vampires, I tell ya! Vampires! With big honkin' fangs!

The Joker:
Joker's back from the grave!

The Penguin:
Yeah, a lot of that going around.

The Joker:
Batsy, you complete me.

Dracula:
Go ahead and run! You cannot escape me, Batman! I am evil incarnate! I am the Prince of...

[He floats up and sees Batman standing in front of the sunlight machine]

Dracula:
...Darkness?

Batman:
Rise and shine.

[triggers the machine, and blasts Dracula with artificial sunlight]

The Penguin:
Agh! Dead guys don't do that.

Dracula:
Not dead... UN-dead.

The Penguin:
I think I need to UN-wet my pants.

[researching Bruce Wayne at the newspaper archive]

Vicky Vale:
What is it about you that keeps me coming back? Your boyish charm... hot bod... tons of money... if only I were shallow.

Dracula:
So the folktales are true. There is another bat in Gotham.

Batman:
Count Dracula, I presume?

Dracula:
A legend you are apparently intimate with.

Batman:
Don't flatter yourself.

Dracula:
We cast kindred shadows. Have you not seen the news?

Batman:
I don't harm people!

Dracula:
You have no concept of the harm of which I am capable... if only because I really hate to waste a life, when it can be spent in servitude to me.

Batman:
Life or living death?

Dracula:
To become vampire is to heighten all of one's senses, to attain speed, strength, and immortality.