The Birthday Party

Stanley Webber:
How would you like to go away with me?

Lulu:
What?

Stanley Webber:
How would you like to go away with me?

Lulu:
Where would we go?

Stanley Webber:
Nowhere...

Lulu:
Well that's a charming proposal.

Stanley Webber:
There's nowhere to go, so we could just go, it wouldn't matter.

Lulu:
We might as well stay here.

Nat Goldberg:
But a birthday, I always feel, is a great occasion, taken too much for granted these days. What a thing to celebrate, birth! Like getting up in the morning. Marvelous! Some people don't like the idea of getting up in the morning. I've heard them. Getting up in the morning, they say, what is it? Your skin's crabby, you need a shave, your eyes are full of muck, your mouth is like a boghouse, the palms of your hands are full of sweat, your nose is clogged up, your feet stink, what are you but a corpse waiting to be washed? Whenever I hear that point of view I feel cheerful. Because I know what it is to wake up with the sun shining, to the sound of the lawnmower, all the little birds, the smell of grass, church bells, tomato juice...

Stanley Webber:
Get out.

Nat Goldberg:
You're in a terrible humor today Mr Webber... and on your birthday too.