The Competition

Paul:
Nobody looks that good in direct sunlight, so it's not like you're such a knockout.

Andrew Erskine:
[Heidi's piano needs adjusting and she wants to play a different concerto] Well, maybe I'm not in the mood to conduct the Profofiev Third!

Greta Vandemann:
[to Andrew Erskine] Andrew! It costs extra to carve "schmuck" on a tombstone, but you would definitely be worth the expense!

Greta Vandemann:
[Referring to the piano] That is your first husband, that, you... you marry it the way a nun marries Jesus. You cleave to it, because it gives your life a center that no man... that very few men can possibly give you, least of all a rival for the thing your life is centered on.

Greta Vandemann:
What can you play on 24 hours notice if Serkin or Gilels cancels?

Heidi Joan Schoonover:
Serkin Gilels 24-Hour Cancellation Blues.

Paul Dietrich:
I don't think it's possible to rehearse two concerti at once, Heidi-Ho!

Heidi Joan Schoonover:
Teardrops on my b*obs - great country-western standard.

Mr. Dietrich:
This is a courtesy van; let's show some goddamn courtesy!

Paul:
If you win, great - if I win, better!

Greta Vandemann:
[Lighting a cigarette] Ludwig Von Beethoven taught Carl Czerny, who taught Leschetizky, who taught Schnabel, who taught Renaldi, who taught me. And now the sixth pianist in a direct line from Beethoven is standing here staring at me in her Jordan Marsh mix-and-match.

Heidi Joan Schoonover:
You shouldn't smoke.