The Great McGonagall

William McGonagall:
But for my age I too would have joined your army.

Queen Victoria:
Oh come now, Mr McGonagall. You're only 45.

William McGonagall:
Aye, that's my age but I do not...

Queen Victoria:
Oh come now, join up. Join up and travel to distant and exotic places. Meet interesting and exciting people, and then kill them.

William McGonagall:
Is anything worn under the kilt?

John Brown:
No, everything is in working order.

Queen Victoria:
I am Queen Victoria, and I am very big in England!