The Green Berets

Colonel Mike Kirby:
What are you going to say in that newspaper of yours about us in Vietnam?

George Beckworth:
If I say what I feel, I may be out of a job.

Hugh Parkinson:
Perhaps you could answer a question all of us here are asking?

Sergeant Muldoon:
We'll try.

Hugh Parkinson:
Why is the United States waging this ruthless war in Vietnam?

Sergeant Muldoon:
Foreign policy decisions are not made by the military. A soldier goes where he is told to go, and fight whom is told to fight.

George Beckworth:
There is such a thing as due process.

Colonel Mike Kirby:
Out here, due process is a bullet.

Hamchunk:
Was my Peter-san brave?

Sgt. Petersen:
[after being woken up by Sgt Muldoon] 3:30! Is that right, Sarge?

Sergeant Muldoon:
That's right, Soldier-boy. That's right!

Sgt. Petersen:
We'd better get some sleep! We've got a hell of a lot of work to do tomorrow!

Sergeant Muldoon:
[after seeing him in non-military issued pajamas] Peterson, I worry about you. Three tours of duty and you're still acting like a civilian!

Sgt. Petersen:
Muldoon, I'm not a Marine. I believe in my comfort!

Capt. Nim:
My home is in Hanoi. You see, first I kill all stinking Cong, then go home.

Capt. MacDaniel:
[Later] Sounds like he means it.

Captain Coleman:
He keeps score on the wall.

[last lines]

Colonel Mike Kirby:
You're what this is all about.

Sergeant Muldoon:
Are you sure that's what he wanted?

Colonel Mike Kirby:
Affimative!

Sergeant Muldoon:
Maybe he liked so many guys thinking about him.

Colonel Mike Kirby:
Besides that... It SINGS! [exits]

Sergeant Muldoon:
[to himself] It sings? That's what he said. Provo's Privy, It DOES sing!

George Beckworth:
Petersen, what was all that talk about the enemy building ladders and coffins?

Sgt. Petersen:
Well, when Charlie knows he's got a nice box to be buried in, he's just as brave as hell.

George Beckworth:
What about the ladders?

Sgt. Petersen:
They throw the ladders across the wire to get at us. And later on, they use them for litters to stack on and carry away the dead bodies.

George Beckworth:
Later on... you mean after everybody's dead?

Sgt. Petersen:
Yes, everybody. Men... women... and children. Everybody.

Gladys Cooper:
It's strange that we've never read of this in the newspapers.

Sergeant Muldoon:
Well... that's newspapers for you, ma'am. You could fill volumes with what you don't read in them."

George Beckworth:
How do you know we should be fighting for this present government of South Vietnam? They have no constitution. They haven't had any free elections. And six months ago, a committee was appointed to form a constitution... and still no constitution.

Sergeant Muldoon:
The school I went to, Mr. Beckworth, taught us that the thirteen colonies, with proper and educated leadership, all with the same goal in mind, AFTER the Revolutionary War, took from 1776 to 1787, eleven years of peaceful effort, before they came up with a paper that all thirteen colonies would sign... our present Constitution.

[the audience applauds]

George Beckworth:
That's very good, Sergeant. But there are still a lot of people who believe that this is simply a war between the Vietnamese people! It's their war, let's let them handle it.

Sergeant Muldoon:
Let them handle it, Mr. Beckworth?

[Points to a collection of weapons]

Sergeant Muldoon:
Captured weaponry.

[as Muldoon takes the weapons from the board, he names them, then drops them on the table in front of Beckworth]

Sergeant Muldoon:
From Red China: Chicom K-50 sub-machine gun... Chinese communist! SKS Soviet-made semi-automatic carbine... Russian communist! Ammunition, Czechoslovakian-made... Czech communist! No sir, Mr. Beckworth! It doesn't take a lead weight to fall on me or a hit from one of those weapons to recognize that what's involved here is communist domination of the world!

Doc McGee:
How come you like blowing things up so much?

Sergeant Muldoon:
My dad gave me a chemistry set. It got bigger than both of us.

Sgt. Petersen:
With joyous memories, we leave the mystical city of Da Nang! What gay adventure lies ahead? Brother, this trip is gonna make LSD feel like aspirin!

Captain Coleman:
Oh, uh, I noticed a load of corrugated tin has miraculously appeared overnight.

Capt. MacDaniel:
Sergeant Petersen provided it.

Captain Coleman:
Well, that's a good man you've got there.

Colonel Mike Kirby:
Sergeant Petersen say where he got it?

Capt. MacDaniel:
He, uh, said The Good Fairy left it.

Colonel Mike Kirby:
[smiling] I hope he said The Good Fairy left it, SIR!

SSGT Muldoon:
It is a Communist plot to overthrow the world! Another one of their attempts at world domination!