The Gun and the Pulpit

[first lines]

Head of Posse:
Ernie Parsons, having been found guilty by a jury of your peers...

Ernie Parsons:
I didn't see any jury.

Head of Posse:
Well, they was around. Anyway, what difference does it make. You gunned down Windy Jones and he was one of our most beloved and respected citizens.

Ernie Parsons:
I heard he was the town drunk.

Head of Posse:
Well, now that he's dead, he's one of our town's most beloved and respected citizens.

[recalling a gunfight]

Billy One-Eye:
This kid was the fastest thing I ever seen. Caught that gunny flat-footed. Why, he was dead before God got the news.