The Immortals

Jack:
How the hell are you?

Dominic:
Oh, you look pretty good for a dead man Jack.

Jack:
You know Dom, knowing you're dead can be a very liberating experience.

Jack:
Well you know, taking money from this organization and leaving them alive makes for a very shady future.

Dominic:
You f***ing ingrate!

Jack:
Dominic, don't hurt my feelings.

Dominic:
Florence? You see that hippie back there? If he even flickers or quivers, blow his head off!

Dominic:
Tiny? The guy... this Peter. Peter is it, yeah? Peter. This guy, Peter. If he even moves, put a hole in the back of his bald head.

Pete:
Jack, you better hope he kills me.

George:
Billy, Billy, Billy they're... they're calling for backup.

Billy:
Wait, wait wait. What the f*** did you just call me? Did you just use my f***ing name?

George:
When?

Billy:
Am I gonna go crazy here or he just f***ing used my name?

Cafe Manager:
He just f***ing used you're name.

Billy:
You just used my f***in' name! You idiot! You f***in' mo... Wait, wait did I call you an idiot? I'm sorry... GEORGE! I'm sorry.

Tim:
Well I'd rather be partnered up with a foreigner, than with a butt-pirate.

[Kerry flips Tim off]

Deke:
Well at least you know a butt-pirate's gonna watch your ass.

[They all laugh]

Billy:
Hey George, could you come in here and make things worse?

[first lines]

Jack:
And in exchange for this unbelievable opportunity I'm giving you, I will ask each of you for one favor someday. If any here thinks there's even the slightest possible of not returning that favor, they should be out that goddamn door so fast, that their ass catches fire.

Jack:
Time is of the absolute essence. And it's the only thing you can never get back.

George:
I decide to check it out, so I went to the library, and it turns out that Pinocchio is a liar.

Billy:
Yeah. That's why his nose grew.

George:
You went too?

Billy:
No, I've just spent a lot of time in the library.

George:
Really. Which one, 'cause like uh, I've been on day trips to just about every one.

Billy:
Harvard School of Law.

George:
Really? Is that downtown?

Billy:
Hey George, your girlfriend's a heroin addict...

George:
No she's not. She's Cleopatra.

Benny Hayes:
Is it true?

Pete:
What?

Benny Hayes:
That you're on your way out, too?

Pete:
You think this bald is a fashion statement. Cancer.

Jack:
I will not be a pawn any more. I am a king!

Dominic:
If only for a day. [gun fire]

Deke:
What's wrong with you.

Gina Walker:
B*obs. Five-point deduction. Breast cancer.

Mifune:
Did it all go as planned?

Jack:
Well, I would have preferred not to have been shot in the face, but all *ended* as planned.

Mifune:
Now we understand the conflict between duty and emotion, don't we?

[last lines]

Jack:
[George seeing pregnant couple] Come on George.