The Lost Room

Wally Jabrowski:
I don't believe in ghosts, all right?

Joe Miller:
Yeah, me neither. I mean, magic bus ticket - sure. But ghosts, no.

Jennifer Bloom:
Here's some fake I.D.'s, a couple of credit cards. That should last for a while.

Joe Miller:
"Joe Doorman?" Hilarious.

Joe Miller:
Objects don't work in the room, Ruber!

Karl Kreutzfeld:
You're still not seeing the Objects for what they really are. They're tools... tools to reshape reality. The properties that we perceive, they're side-effects, tip of the iceberg. The Objects allow us to change reality on levels that out brains can't even understand. Don't you see? Conroy opened up a door though reality itself where anything is possible.

Joe Miller:
Listen to me. I saw what Conroy did, and she almost ripped reality apart.

Karl Kreutzfeld:
But I can do it right this time. I can bring my boy back. I can bring him back to life. We can both bring our children back. Both of them!

Joe Miller:
No, Karl, this isn't just about us. What if you're wrong?

Karl Kreutzfeld:
It will work!

Joe Miller:
And what if it doesn't?

Karl Kreutzfeld:
[pause] Well, everyone will be dead. It won't really matter.

Joe Miller:
Are you alright?

Jennifer Bloom:
Yeah, just don't break my heart.

Joe Miller:
Don't break mine.

Karl Kreutzfeld:
Thank you for coming to me with this. I'll of course pay whatever it is you're asking, whatever price you think is fair. And I shall accept your word that it's genuine. But if at some point I should find out that it's fake, that you tried to con me in any way, or that I hear you've made copies and someone else has one... then I'll have to come back here and hurt you.

The Sood:
Mr. Kreutzfeld. My friend. I am the Sood. I deal in Science. No fakes, no forgeries, no duplicates. I stake my life on it.

Howard "The Weasel" Montague:
Well, well. Took me a while, Detective. You're a difficult man to track down. But every riddle has an answer...

Joe Miller:
I don't have it.

Eddie McCleister:
There's a price for everything, Joe. This is the price. This is the price to get your daughter back.

Joe Miller:
Wally, you can't send teenage girls to hell!

Wally Jabrowski:
You kidding me? Teenage girls deserve it the most!

Wally Jabrowski:
Sometimes when you start getting Objects together, weird things happen. New things. New properties. Totally unpredictable. Take the Watch. Useless, right?

Joe Miller:
The Watch?

Wally Jabrowski:
Wristwatch. Cooks eggs. Nothing else, just eggs. Put an egg in the middle - hardboils it. I don't know how somebody figured that out, but they did. Anyway, nobody used to care much about the Watch until one day somebody found out that if you put the Watch and the Knife together, you get a... kind of telepathy.

Matt:
What does the gun do?

Joe Miller:
It shoots bullets. Really fast.

Joe Miller:
What about the Bus Ticket?

Wally Jabrowski:
Not that useful. Unless you want to get to a little spot outside Gallup, New Mexico in a jiffy, which I don't.

Joe Miller:
Why Gallup?

Wally Jabrowski:
Why not?

Wally Jabrowski:
For your crimes against decency, and politeness, and common courtesy, I condemn you to hell!

Howard "The Weasel" Montague:
This is your plan, huh? You're remodeling.