The Mad Miss Manton

Lt. Mike Brent:
Look, lady, it's been ten minutes since you called us. The murderer, that is if there is a murderer, could be in Brooklyn by now - that is, if anybody *wants* to be in in Brooklyn.

Melsa Manton:
Helen, you search the upstairs.

Helen Frayne:
Oh, no! I was never much of an individualist. If the upstairs has to be searched, we'll search it together.

Dora Fenton:
Why, that's communism!

Dora Fenton:
You know, psychiatrists say hate's just a step away from love.

Helen Frayne:
Yeah, but it's the lull in between that drives you crazy.

Peter Ames:
[to Melsa] You're up to your beautiful hips in murder!

Lt. Mike Brent:
Miss Manton, I don't know what your game is but I know this - either your education or your spankin's been neglected. Now I can't do anything about spankin' ya, or can I?

Melsa Manton:
Hilda, the door!

Hilda:
[already on her way to answer it] I heard it. I ain't deaf. Sometimes I wished I was.

Kit Beverly:
[tagging along after Hilda, talking with her mouth full] Have you another piece of cake, Hilda?

Hilda:
Yes, I have, but the kitchen's closed for the night.

Melsa Manton:
Hilda! Miss Beverly is our guest!

Hilda:
*I* didn't ask 'er up!

Helen Frayne:
Comes the revolution and we'll stop being exploited by our help.

Melsa Manton:
In my house the revolution is here.

Melsa Manton:
[storms into the room and slaps the first man she sees] Are you Peter Ames?

Peter's Secretary:
No...

Peter Ames:
But I am...

Melsa Manton:
[Slaps Peter]

Peter Ames:
[Slaps Melsa] To complete the circle.

Lt. Mike Brent:
Everybody suspects you of holding out, even I do.

Melsa Manton:
Oh, I bet you say that to all the girls.

Edward Norris:
Don't speak to anyone. I don't want to kill an innocent bystander.

Peter Ames:
Ya know that's what I like about crazy men; that fine sense of distinction.

Edward Norris:
You think I'm insane?

Melsa Manton:
[Stands in front of Peter, as to protect him] Oh, he's says that to everybody.

Melsa Manton:
[has just discovered Fonda is faking being near death, to pump her for information] Are you still in pain, sweet?

Peter Ames:
[from hospital bed, faintly] Oh its nothing, nothing... only when I move... but its nothing...

Melsa Manton:
[hovering over hospital bed] Peter, perhaps I did wrong in not telling Inspector Brent everything.

Peter Ames:
You mean you held something back?

Melsa Manton:
Yes Peter.

Peter Ames:
[this is what he's hoping to hear] Oh sweet, you're so clever.

Melsa Manton:
Remember when I went into Ronnie Beldon's apartment?

Peter Ames:
Yes dear.

Melsa Manton:
When I went into the bathroom, I found something.

Peter Ames:
In the bathroom?

Melsa Manton:
Yes, floating around in a foot of water in the bathtub.

Peter Ames:
Louder, dear, I can hardly hear you.

Melsa Manton:
[ominously] I'll come closer.

Peter Ames:
Tell me dear, what was it?

Melsa Manton:
[yelling] The Normandie, you black-hearted faker, in full sail! [stabs him in the leg with a fork]

Peter Ames:
We'll go to South America, for six months - maybe we'll never come back!

Melsa Manton:
Can you afford it?

Peter Ames:
No, but you can.

Melsa Manton:
Isn't there a drop of red blood in your veins? I want to live on your income!

Peter Ames:
That's foolish, who's going to live on yours?

Peter Ames:
[ Referring to Melsa] Isn't she wonderful? That's the girl I'm going to marry.

Lt. Mike Brent:
I'll take Snow White!

Hilda:
[to the telephoe operator] Give me the Morrnin' Clarion. I don't know the numba'! The only numbers I knowse are policy numbers.

Peter Ames:
Listen, before I knew you, I disliked you intensly. When I met you, I disliked you intensly. Even now, I dislike you intensly... that is, the sensible sane portion of me... but there;s an insane side of me that gets a little violent every time I think of you.

Melsa Manton:
Getting out of a million dollar lawsuit wouldn't have anything to do with your change in affection, would it?

Peter Ames:
You're a nasty creature, aren't you, but in time I'll beat it out of you.

Melsa Manton:
[to her friends] Get him, girls!

Peter Ames:
[Nervously, then desparately as the girls engulf and subdue him] Hey, wait a minute, girls... [clicks the phone] Tahe it easy, girls... look... Hello... Help, I tho... wha... ahh!...

Lt. Mike Brent:
[Talking about Melsa] She's probably the kind of dame who would come back to haunt me. Otherwise, I'd shoot to kill.

Melsa Manton:
Police! All they know is to blow a whistle and hold up traffic!

Lt. Mike Brent:
Round up that bag of dames that run around with Manton and bring them down to headquarters. Dreag 'em out of bed if you have to!

Sullivan:
Are you kidding? I hope I have to!

Melsa Manton:
Well, if I want to marry a fortune hunter, I can go to Europe and marry a professional one.

Peter Ames:
All right, Hilda, can you carry a gun?

Hilda:
No, suh! I'se a pacifist.

Melsa Manton:
May I have a cigarette?

[He places one in her mouth, lights it]

Melsa Manton:
I've had dozens of cigarette lighters but they never worked.

Peter Ames:
This just one just takes cheap gasoline.

Melsa Manton:
Maybe that's why.

Hilda:
[throwing an entire pitcher of water in Peter's face] sorry Mr. Ames, it was orders! but, I used distilled water.

Helen Frayne:
Look! I found a bloodstain!

Dora Fenton:
How can that be blood, it's blue!

Gloria Hamilton:
Maybe he shot Mrs. Astor.

Melsa Manton:
Thank you, Helen. You're sweet and very helpful.