The Presidio

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
Now, are you sure you want to have a fight? Because I'm only gonna use my thumb.

Bully in Bar:
Thumb?

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
My right thumb. Left one's much too powerful for you.

Donna Caldwell:
Say something.

Jay Austin:
What?

Donna Caldwell:
That's a start.

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
You're not going out dressed like that, are you?

Donna Caldwell:
Like what?

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
Well, you can see right through that dress. You might just as well go out without one.

Donna Caldwell:
There's a thought.

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
Ah, sh*t on a stick.

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
[to Julius] Now why don't you ask him how he won the Medal of Honor?

Sgt. Major Ross Maclure:
How old are you, Julius?

Julius:
Eight.

Sgt. Major Ross Maclure:
You want to live to be nine?

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
Obviously he didn't win it for charm.

Sgt. Major Ross Maclure:
I've known buildings that were easier to talk to than you.

Sgt. Major Ross Maclure:
You open your mouth one more time, and I'll shove your head so far up your ass, you'll be talking out of your armpit.

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
We used to joke that being in the army was not a matter of life and death. It's more important than that.

Thug (unknown):
Who the hell do you think you are?

Sgt. Major Ross Maclure:
I'm the Infantry, sonny.

Jay Austin:
The reason why I'm here is because I'm interested in you, not your father.

Jay Austin:
You know what I'd like? [smiles] I'd like you to resist arrest. Just a little. God, I'd really like that. [cuffs one hand] You have the right to remain silent, you have the right to an attorn - [Col. Paul Lawrence elbows him in the face with free arm]

[Lt.Col Caldwell has just beaten up the bully in the bar who had started a fight with him]

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
You see these little oak leaves? [points to the silver oak leaves on his lapels] They're silver. That means I'm a lieutenant-colonel. If they were gold, THEN I'd be a major! Understand? [hits the bully's head on the bar]

Bully in Bar:
[grunts & nods] Yes sir!

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
Now, next time you see an officer of the Army, you'll know how to recognize his rank!

[Lt-Col. Caldwell walks out of the bar]

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
What in the hell is "the Dead"?

Jay Austin:
You wouldn't understand.

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
Try me.

Jay Austin:
The Grateful Dead.

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
The Grateful Dead?

Jay Austin:
Grateful Dead.

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
I don't understand.

Jay Austin:
[sarcastically] That's a surprise.