The Wingmen

Zach:
This is a bad day.

Champion:
I'll say. I lost a computer and a picture of Ronald Reagan.

Chris:
I did some calculations on the bills and here is a chart with the help of Jordan that we drew.

Zach:
Why am I a dinosaur?

Zach:
Jordan, why'd you lose money?

Jordan:
Well, I had to pay for this chart.

Zach:
Okay, we can't keep sinking money into charts.

Zach:
What kind of man do you like? Do you like curly-haired men? Do you like gay men? Do you like men in wheelchairs?

Girl:
Definitely men in wheelchairs.

Zach:
[pause] Really?

Girl:
Yeah.

Zach:
Hi.

Chris:
[after Jessica slaps Aaron] I personally was hoping that he would punch her back. I thought that would be funny.

Gaston:
I can kill him if you want.

Jessica:
Um, I don't think you need to kill him.

Jessica:
[to camera] I think it was sweet. You know, he didn't have to make that offer and he did.

[first lines]

Zach:
It's been a tough week with the cancellation and then the fine, so I've been looking around trying to get money and I actually went out on the street and I just wrote "Need 15 grand" on a cardboard pizza box and people started calling me homeless and I was like, "Hey, dude on the bike, I'm not homeless," and then I get home and we're evicted, so I guess I owe him an apology.

Jordan:
Houses are overrated.

Zach:
My first home was the womb, of course. I think that's why I'm so good with ladies.

Jordan:
[holding a ringing alarm clock] What did I set this for?

Marshall:
[drinking Dr. Pepper] We can't have drinks on camera. It's brand endorsement.

Jordan:
[to Chris] What happened to my Dr. Pepper? I was gonna offer you some.