There Goes the Neighborhood

Willis Embry:
I'm Willy Goldberg. I'm from Texas.

Swan Babitt:
You lost your accent.

Willis Embry:
[in Texas Accent] Did I?

Albert Lodge:
You're gonna hear from my lawyer.

Willis Embry:
Does he know karate too?

Albert Lodge:
He certainly doesn't waste time.

Willis Embry:
Don't get hysterical. [holds up pickaxe]

Albert Lodge:
How could you choose Marty Rollins to sell the house? He's a sex fiend!

Jessie Lodge:
Some of us are loyal to our friends. Besides, he's getting help.

Albert Lodge:
No,he's beyond help.HE'S A MANIAC!

Jessie Lodge:
Look who's talking.

Albert Lodge:
Why are you so dirty?

Lyle Corrente:
NONE OF YOUR GOD DAMN BUSINESS!

Jeffrey Babitt:
I gotta learn to read lips.

Swan Babitt:
You the new gardener?

Lyle Corrente:
What if I am?

Swan Babitt:
My parents need one. How much do you cost?

Lyle Corrente:
I'm booked.

Swan Babitt:
They're very competitive. I'm sure they'll pay more than you're getting here.

Lyle Corrente:
Tell them I can't be bought.

Swan Babitt:
They'd never understand that.

Lyle Corrente:
Then tell them to go f*** themselves.

Swan Babitt:
They'll understand that.

[first lines]

1st Burglar:
[whispering] This one's unlocked.

Martha:
[phone rings, answering machine picks up] Willis and Martha can't come to the phone right now. Please leave a message. [beep]

Albert Lodge:
Hey Willis... it's your wake up call. Willis, get up. Are you listening to me?

Willis Embry:
[picks up] Huh?

Albert Lodge:
See you in the bubble.

Willis Embry:
Yeah, okay... [hangs up and plays back his messages]

Martha:
Willis, I'd tell you this in person, but as you always say, I have a fear of confrontation. I'm leaving you. I need to find my true self and I think traveling around the world is the answer. So listen, I took the 5000 dollars out of your account. I'll pay you back when I can. I hope you're not made. Anyway, since you're a psychologist, I hope you understand this is nothing personal. It's just something I have to do. Goodbye. [beep]

[repeated line]

Norman Rutledge:
I'm comfortable with that.

Willis Embry:
I'm not a maniac, I'm a psychologist.

Jeffrey Babitt:
Don't be juvenile.

Swan Babitt:
I am a juvenile.

Handsome Harry:
How'd you sleep?

Peedi Rutledge:
Oh, not bad. I've never slept tied up before.

Handsome Harry:
No?

Lyle Corrente:
[to neighborhood kids] There's a philosophical point I'm tryin' to make here. The world is divided up into the Do-ers and the Do-ees. The Do-ees pay taxes and generally get shited upon. People look up to the Do-ers. I'm a Do-er.

Handsome Harry:
Lyle, may I have a word with you...

Mr. Bratesman:
[about his hand on her leg] Will you stop. What's wrong with you?

Marty Rollins:
I'm trying to get help.

Mr. Bratesman:
You are? So am I.

Marty Rollins:
We meet Wednesdays.

Mr. Bratesman:
We meet Tuesdays.

Marty Rollins:
Am I hurting you?

Mr. Bratesman:
[big smile] Just a little.

[last lines]

Willis Embry:
Look uh, I'm sorry about the way things turned out. I uh...

Jessie Lodge:
No. I gambled I lost.

Willis Embry:
Yeah.

Jessie Lodge:
I met you.

Willis Embry:
Is that good or bad?

Jessie Lodge:
You tell me.

[Marvin, holding his gun in his lap is watching 48 Hrs. with Harry and the Rutledges as Lyle comes running towards the house yelling]

Lyle Corrente:
Marvin!

[Marvin reflexively begins shooting his gun across the wall uncontrollably, causing Peedi to start screaming in panic]

Peedi Rutledge:
I told you they had silencers!

Norman Rutledge:
[seeing his damaged painting on the wall] My Neo! MY INVESTMENT!

Peedi Rutledge:
Your investme-? I never liked that painting anyway!

Lyle Corrente:
[poking his head in the door] May I speak without getting SHOT AT?