They Call Me Mister Tibbs!

[talking about Rice Weedon]

Puff:
You killed him.

Virgil Tibbs:
Look, let's get the record straight. He started that shoot out.

Puff:
Well, you bastard, you killed the wrong man he didn't do it!

[first lines]

Joy Sturges:
Get away from me! Get away from me! Get the hell away from me! I can't even fake it anymore.

Logan Sharpe:
I never pay much attention to jewelry, Virg'.

Virgil Tibbs:
You're wearing some.

Logan Sharpe:
This was my mother's. You may remember having seen her wear it.

Virgil Tibbs:
I don't pay much attention to jewelry either.

Virgil Tibbs:
I read somewhere, a famous psychologist once said that, uh, if your kid sees you pat your wife on the fanny and she looks like she likes it, then it gives them a healthy attitude toward sex.

Virgil Tibbs:
You know, in less than ten years now, you're going to be on your own. Schools are through, the army's through, your mother and me - we'll be through. You'll be on your own then, Mr., you ever thought of that one? And what are you going to do? What are you going to be?

Andy Tibbs:
Well, that depends.

Virgil Tibbs:
On what?

Andy Tibbs:
On you.

Virgil Tibbs:
How?

Andy Tibbs:
If you don't have any money, I'll be a bum. But if you rich, I'll be a playboy.

Rice Weedon:
Woah, Lieutenant! Always a pleasure. Now, Lieutenant Tibbs, that is Puff.

Virgil Tibbs:
Always a pleasure.

Puff:
Which is it, army, navy, or airforce?

Virgil Tibbs:
Homicide.

Puff:
Ah, do tell. But you're not fuzzy fuzz, are you?

Puff:
Have a shot of sixteen year old bourbon, $12.95 a fifth? That's the attraction here.

Virgil Tibbs:
Thanks. Soda.

Rice Weedon:
Puff is the most amusing little chick this side of the morgue.

Puff:
But I love him. He beats me.

Virgil Tibbs:
You picked the right man, Puff. He's big. He owns three fire traps over at the Potrero section and inspectors don't bother him. Nobody bothers him.

Puff:
He doesn't love you, Honey. Even with that $12.95 taste in his mouth. I wonder why.

Virgil Tibbs:
A case is never solved until a judge says it is.

Virgil Tibbs:
We found your fingerprints in there, Whedon.

Rice Weedon:
You can find my fingerprints all over this building.

Puff:
He's a very friendly landlord.

[last lines]

Reporter:
How is he, Mister Tibbs?

Virgil Tibbs:
He's dead.

Reporter:
But it was an accident?

Virgil Tibbs:
Yes.

Reporter:
But he was in custody?

Virgil Tibbs:
Yes.

Reporter:
Do you consider the case solved?

Virgil Tibbs:
The case is never solved until the judge...