Tillie and Gus

Augustus Q. Winterbottom:
The passing years have slowed you on the draw, my little chickadee.

Tillie Winterbottom:
Do you like children?

Augustus Q. Winterbottom:
I do if they're properly cooked.

Commissioner McLennan:
I'm not so sure. This boat was launched in eighteen hundred and eighty-one.

Augustus Q. Winterbottom:
So was my wife, but she's still sea-worthy.

Commissioner McLennan:
She's probably got barnacles all over her. The boat I mean.

Augustus Q. Winterbottom:
She's as solid a brick telephone booth.

Augustus Q. Winterbottom:
I'll bend every effort to win this race, and I come from a long line of effort benders.

Tom Sheridan:
I claim that ferry boat race was the world's greatest gamble.

Augustus Q. Winterbottom:
No, don't forget, Lady Godiva put everything she had on a horse.

Mary Sheridan:
You two are angels straight from heaven!

Augustus Q. Winterbottom:
[coughs] We detoured slightly on the way.

Augustus Q. Winterbottom:
Poker? Is that the game where one receives five cards, and if there's two alike that's pretty good, but if there's three alike that's much better?