Scream Queens2015

Chad Radwell:
I took a class last semester called "American Presidents," or something like that. And they taught us about a man named John Fitzpatrick Kennedy, Jr. And that dude wrote a book about the time he served in Vietnam called "Profiles in Courage." Is that not what we are talking about right now? Courage? Halloween is the greatest night of the year. Greatest night! Because on this night, even shy, kind of homely girls dress up like total sluts. I mean every costume's just a slutty version of something. Slutty teacher, slutty nurse, slutty nun. I saw a girl last year dressed as slutty Al-Qaeda! Are we going to deny ourselves the sluttiest night of the year out of fear? Will you look at Caufield? This dude got his arms sawed off; he's not hiding out. He is down to rage!

Caulfield:
Hell, yeah, I am!

Chad Radwell:
See Halloween, it's a night for dudes with killer bods to walk around with our shirts off. And it is totally appropriate as long as we call ourselves gladiators, Chippendales. As our 60th president John Kennedy, Jr. said, "The only thing we have to fear, it's fear itself." Well, in this case serial murderers too. But we're not afraid of either of those things, nuh-uh. So... cancelling Halloween sucks. Thank you.

Dean Cathy Munsch:
I have no idea how you got into this college.