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Narrator: Eddie has ambitions to be a great moviemaker/To follow the likes of Lucas and Linklater/He makes his own films at home in the garden/One boy and his dog on the first rung to stardom/Then once a week he premieres his blockbuster/An audience of Mum and Dad is all he can muster/Now Eddie's genre of preference is horror and slash/With ketchup for blood and cars that crash/But dealing with death has become an obsession/And his no budget horror flicks are his only possession/Each night is spent tossing and turning in bed/As the screams of his plastic men ring loud in his head/More tortured nights and then after a week/He strikes upon a solution to help him to sleep/Eddie's plan is quite simple in his own accursed mind/For you have to be cruel in order to be kind/And although this will be hard on him and doesn't seem fair/If the nights continue sleepless he'll slip further into despair/So he brings out the tapes he'll use to build his pyre/And both his work and his nightmares will dance inside a fire/His phantoms and his ghouls will pass with this cremation/And a peaceful nights sleep will be Eddie's salvation/So the trial he has been facing is nearing its end/And normality will become Eddie's new friend/With the torment he faced now a pile of ash/A small part of Eddie thinks he's acted too rash/The dissenting voice in his mind questions his actions/It's good versus evil, two warring factions/The nightmares have remained and to make matters worse/Eddie's convinced he's now under a curse/Isolated, confused and too scared to sleep/This debilitating condition is beginning to reap/And harvest the fears that have long been there/Of the slasher and the bogey man that lives under the stair/It's becoming too much, it's becoming too much/But what can he do, it's becoming too much/There are no strands of decency left for Eddie to clutch/It has become too much, it has become too much/It has become too much for Eddie's shoulders to bear/And the once violence-free mind is no longer there.

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    Quiz

    Are you a quotes master?

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    Barbra Streisand's first line in her first movie was...?
    A "Hello gorgeous!"
    B "Papa, can you hear me?"
    C "Hi, I am here!"
    D "Hello, Dolly!"