Gimme Gimme Gimme, Season 2

Tom:
Actors don't do that, they mill around with perfect posture, and utter inspirational nuggets like "D'you know, this is only job where you actually get paid for doing something you love!"

Linda:
Well, that's bollocks. What about prostitutes?

Linda:
I am not having my gorgeous flat turned into no bloody poxy fame school! I don't wanna wake up in the morning and find 15 anorexics chucking up in me loo!

(Talking to the forgetful funeral director)

Bob Hobbs:
: Well it's traditional to tell family and friends. I mean, ya can tell a complete stranger, but they don't often give a -

Linda La Hughes:
(cutting in) Shit?

Bob Hobbs:
Donation.

Linda':
I ain't a pussy person. When people look at me they don't think cat, they think dog.

Tom:
We're here. Lindy's queer. Get used to it.

Tom:
I like the men in my life to be strong, to stand up for what they believe in, not to be so far back in the closet they're in FUCKING NARNIA!!