Transformers: Animated, Season 1

Ratchet:
Why do you waste your time with those old history vids.

Optimus Prime:
All the great Autobot leaders learn from the past.

Megatron:
What do you want now, Starscream?

Starscream:
(Puts a bomb on Megatron's back) Only to wish you luck, my legue.

Megatron:
I don't believe in luck. (Transforms and flies into space)

Starscream:
Neither do I.

Captain Fanzone:
You 4. What kind of fall back do you not understand? I want their badges and... where's the drivers? How's my car drivin itself?

Sari:
I think my dad's lookin for me.

Bulkhead:
Hey you're leaking.

Sari:
No. It's called crying. That's what we humans do when we feel sad and scared and care for the ones we loved.

Sari:
What's that? (her key, powered by an AllSpark fragment, connects to the door's electronic lock.) Whoa, check that out!

Computer voice:
Access denied. (Sparks fly) Access...access granted.

Prof. Sumdac:
(yawning) No, no, Sari, you know that no one, not even you, is allowed in my private lab. Rules are rules.

Sari:
Good morning to you too, Dad. I brought you a cup of tea.

Prof. Sumdac:
Oh, thank you, thank you, but I am not thirsty. (looks away as he speaks, but quickly downs the whole cup)

Sari:
Hmm...when was the last time you ate?

Prof. Sumdac:
(puts the cup down) What is today?

Sari:
(chuckles) Let's get you some breakfast.

Prof. Sumdac:
Oh, but Sari, I am not hungry. (stomach growls) Well, perhaps just an apple...and a banana. Better make that a whole fruit salad. (Sari leads him out of his lab and down the hall, his voice fading.) and waffles...with bacon...and...a cheese omelette...

"Robot Head":
Autobot...mega...mega...mega...mega...me-e-e-ega...I...am...Megatron...mega...mega...mega...mega...

Megatron:
What...where am I? (sees his disembodied hand and realizes he can't move) Where is my body!? How long have I been offline? (a clip from "Transform and Roll Out, Part 2" is on screen.) What kind of antiquated system am I hooked into?!

Starscream:
I DEFEATED MEGATRON! I planted the device that overloaded his circuitry! His fate was sealed before he even reached your ship!

Megatron:
(furiously) STARSCREAAAAM?!? (sparks fly out and blow out the lights above his head) They don't even know I'm alive. (another clip is shown on the AllSpark) This cannot be happening...the AllSpark finally within my reach...and I have no hands to grasp it!

Megatron:
Hmm...perhaps I'm not as immobile as I thought. (the crane grabs a tiny robot on the work desk and moves it to Megatron's face.) There may be more than one way to locate the AllSpark...and destroy all who dare oppose me! (the tiny robot's eye flickers to life)

Bumblebee:
That long?

Bulkhead:
His attention span is short, too.

Bumblebee:
I heard that!

Prowl:
Apparently, so is his fuse.

Bulkhead:
Ooh, the ninjabot gets in a good one!

Ratchet:
Who knew he had it in him?

Bumblebee:
Yeah, aren't you supposed to be the strong, silent type? Emphasis on the silent.

Sumdac:
Prometheus, why are you doing this?

Meltdown:
Because you're a fraud!

Meltdown:
I am smarter, better-looking, and more educated than you, and yet, everything you touch turns to gold! While everything I touch...

[Statue melts, and Meltdown throws it out through a window]

Meltdown:
Just...look at me. I'm a freak! But I refuse to be beaten by some simpering nerd who merely got lucky!

Bumblebee:
Turbo boosters! Suh-weet!

Optimus Prime:
You're not actually thinking of hooking these things up to yourself, are you?

Bumblebee:
Oh, of course not! I was gonna ask the doc-bot to do it for me.

Ratchet:
Have you got your processor up your exhaust port? These things are untested, incompatible—

Sari:
And totally wicked fast!

Bumblebee:
You ROCK!

Sari:
No, YOU rock!

Bumblebee:
No, YOU rock!

Sari:
No, YOU rock!

Bumblebee:
I said YOU rock!

Sari:
I said YOU rock!

Bumblebee:
YOU rock!

Sari:
YOU rock!

Bumblebee:
[Bad Slavic accent] Velcome. I am Count Dracubot. I vant to drink your motor oil.

Bulkhead:
Hey, guys! I finally found something big enough for my ghost costume.

[Fumes surround his feet, causing Sari to cough]

Sari:
Bulkhead, where did you get that sheet?

Bulkhead:
It was just draped over some house. Weird place for a bed sheet, huh?

Sari:
Oh, that's not a bedsheet. That's a fumigation tent.

Bulkhead:
Really…? What's a fumigation tent?

[As well as the fumes, Bulkhead's feet are now covered in dead cockroaches.]

Sari:
Optimus! Check out my costume!

[Camera reveals that Sari is Optimus Prime]

Sari:
[Imitating Optimus] Oh, look at me. I'm Optimus Prime. I'm scared of spiders.

[Bumblebee and Bulkhead chuckle]

Optimus:
That's not what I sound like—is it?

Bumblebee:
Last chance to join us, Boss Bot.

Optimus:
Thanks, but I'll pass. Just be careful out there, all right?

Sari:
Don't worry. I'll keep these two out of trouble. [Imitating Optimus] Transform and roll out!

[Optimus gives Sari a look]

Sari:
Couldn't resist.

Bumblebee:
Here it comes!

Bulkhead:
Swing it! Give it the old Bulkhead treatment, Sari!

Optimus:
Why exactly is she swinging at a colorful animal?

Ratchet:
Smack it! Smack it already!

Bulkhead:
Hold on, Sari, I'll help! I don't even need a bat.

Prowl:
This will not end well….

Hothead Blitzwing:
Careful, you copper-clad klutz! You stepped in something!

Random Blitzwing:
But with a few dancing lessons, you'll be light on your stabilizing servos like me. Cha cha cha.

Lugnut:
Silence, Blitzwing! I did not follow this beacon halfway across the galaxy for dancing lessons! This was Megatron's ship!

Random Blitzwing:
Ahaha, Starscream never did have a knack for parking.

Hothead Blitzwing:
These can't be those miserable Autobots, they're far too small.

Random Blitzwing:
But look at that one! It's big, it's bold, it's sassy!

Lugnut:
You! What have you done with our beloved leader Megatron? Talk!

Icy Blitzwing:
The Autobots have called in reinforcements. Perhaps we should lay low until we can determine their strength and numbers.

Lugnut:
I will not hide. I will stand proudly and shout Megatron's name to the heavens!

Megatron:
Oh, for spark's sake...

Optimus:
We'll have to repair our ship and move the AllSpark off this planet.

Bulkhead:
We can't just pick up and go. She'll understand.

Bulkhead:
Hanging out. Teaching her ninja nerve blows. Watching cartoons.

Fanzone:
Hold up? What was that again?

Bulkhead:
Watching cartoons.

Fanzone:
No before that.

Bulkhead:
Teaching her ninja nerve blows.

Fanzone:
You're teaching an eight-year-old to do nerve blows?

Ratchet:
You want her to pick it up in the street?

Prowl:
This is part of every protoform's elemental programming.

Fanzone:
Say what?

Bulkhead:
Yeah, it's not like we're having her fight Decepticons.

Isaac Sumdac:
Mr. Masterson! I have told my staff time and again: we do not make military robots or headmaster units that takeover other military robots for...more military things!

Optimus Prime:
I'm afraid I don't see the logic in trying to reproduce an image with such primitive tools.

Prowl:
I believe it's more about creating something from one's imagination, like this one for instance.

Bulkhead:
Actually, that was an accident I had with Ratchet's blow torch.

Ratchet:
You ask me, it's all a waste of time. No 'bot ever saved anyone with art.

Bumblebee:
At least I can get this junk out of me. I was feeling kinda bloated.

[Electronic devices suddenly fall out of him, Prowl gives him a look]

Bumblebee:
What? You said to pack the bare essentials!

Prowl:
Since when are surround-sound speakers, a strobe light, and a hand-held media player "bare essentials?"

Bumblebee:
You should've seen what I left back at the plant.

Prowl:
Where did you even find room for all of this junk?

[Bumblebee taps his fingers uncomfortably]

Bumblebee:
I'd... rather not say.

[Night time came and Bumblebee tries to make a tent. He then walks around with a TV behind Prowl]

Bumblebee:
Where do they hide the outlets?

Prowl:
For the hundredth time, there is no electricity in the woods. Fire is what provides warmth and light. It's also nature's way of clenacing.

Bumblebee:
But chainsaws and pavements were much more effective. So let me barrow your battery for a few hours.

[Sari tries a make a campfire, but fail]

Sari:
Ow. I could use some of that fire. These marshmallows aren't gonna roast themselves.

Bumblebee:
Let me show you.

[Prowl then make a campfire with his hands]

Bumblebee:
Hey! Why don't you pick on someone your own size?!

[Creature swipes at Bumblebee and Sari]

Bumblebee:
Okay. Maybe we're a little unclear on the concept of "your own size".

Sari:
Maybe you should stop talking logic to a creature that has no head!

Bumblebee:
Attention, barnacle monster! Come out with your hands over your...well, you don't have a head. But you get the idea.

Sari:
And then, they were back to normal, like nothing ever happened. Meanwhile, I'm stuck riding home with no dry clothes and an Autobot whose car mode doesn't have a heater!

[Sari sneezes]

Optimus:
You showed a lot of courage and ingenuity, Sari. And hopefully, you'll stop...backfiring soon.

Sari:
Hel-lo, it's called "sneezing".

[Sari sneezes, then blows her nose]

Bumblebee:
I don't even wanna know what that's called.

Lugnut:
And the universe will rejoice! All hail your grand and glorious return!

Starscream:
Okaaay. What's his malfunction?

Icy Blitzwing:
Technical glitch. It happens.

Random Blitzwing:
A lot, actually! Ahahahaha!

Lugnut:
It is not a glitch! It is Megatron, and he commands us to deliver him the Key!

Starscream:
Megatron...?! Did you just say Megatron?! Did he just say 'MEGATRON?! THERE IS NO MEGATRON! MEGATRON IS OFFLINE! TERMINATED! I DID IT MYSEL—saw it myself.

Optimus Prime:
The fate of the Earth and Cybertron hang in the balance and all I've got in my command are a bunch of undisciplined, insubordinate MALFUNCTIONS!"

Hothead Blitzwing:
The Key, Autobot!

Ratchet:
You'll have to pry it from my cold, offline servo. >

[Blitzwing switches to his icy face, freezes Ratchet, then switches to his random face]

Random Blitzwing:
Well, it's not exactly offline, but— [Rips off Ratchet's arm] —it's certainly cold. Ahahahaha!

Starscream:
YOU INTERRUPTED MY SPEECH!! But don't worry. It won't happen again.

Optimus Prime:
Do your worst, Megatron. I'll give up the location of the AllSpark!

Megatron:
Oh, I don't need you for that, Autobot. The child's key will lead me straight to it.

Optimus Prime:
No!

Professor Sumdac:
Oh dear, this is all my fault!

Sari:
What? It's not like you built Megatron in your lab or anything. You built Megatron in your lab!!

Sari:
Open up! I need you to charge something- Anything! So I can save my friends! Why won't you help me!? Why did you choose me in the first place!?

(The AllSpark shows her a Cybertronian spark fused with human DNA)

Sari:
I don't have time for charades!

(Optimus Prime is blasted by a supremely powerful energy beam from the AllSpark)

Megatron:
You appoint yourself protector of the AllSpark, yet you have no concept of its true power!

Sari:
Optimus!

(Throws her Key to him)

Optimus Prime:
You want power!? Have your fill!

Sari:
Did you...destroy the AllSpark?

Optimus Prime:
More like I dispersed it, which that this Key is now the most powerful Cybertronian artifact in existence. And much too valuable to be left in the hands of mere Autobots. If the AllSpark choose you, it must have had a good reason.

Soundwave:
I am Soundwave! I am Decepticon! The revolution begins now!