Torchwood, Series 2

[John has skulled half a bottle of vodka]

Jack:
So, how was rehab?

John:
Rehabs. Plural.

Jack:
Drink, drugs, sex and ...?

John:
Murder.

Jack:
[laughs] You went to murder rehab?

John:
I know. Ridiculous. The odd kill, who does it hurt?

Jack:
[jokingly worried] You clean now?

John:
[deadpan] Yeah, kicked everything, living like a priest.

John:
Ooh, you've got a team. How sweet.[looks at Tosh] Pretty friend. No blonde, though, you need a blonde.

Owen:
God, he's worse than Jack.

John:
Do you have a team name? I love team names. Go on!

Jack:
Torchwood.

John:
Oh, not Excalibur? Blizzard? Bikini Cops? No? Torchwood. Oh dear.

Jack:
[After introducing the team] Meet-

John:
Captain John Hart.

Jack:
We go back.

John:
Excuse me, we more than go back. We were partners.

Ianto:
In what way?

John:
In every way. And then some. [waggles eyebrows]

Jack:
It was two weeks.

John:
Except two weeks were trapped in a time-loop, so we were together for five years. [to the team] It was like having a wife.

Jack:
You were the wife.

John:
You were the wife...

Jack:
No, you were the wife...

John:
Oh, but I was a good wife!

Tosh:
I bet you were! [gets a look off Owen and Gwen] What? Don't pretend you haven't noticed, he's cute!

John:
They're just shy.

Jack:
Oh yeah, I love that office-y feel. I always get excited in these places. To me they're exotic. Office romances... Photocopying your butt... well, maybe not your butt, although whilst we're here why don't we photo-

Ianto:
The rift was active at these coordinates, approximately 200 feet above ground. That means this floor or the roof.

Jack:
...How are you, Ianto?

Ianto:
All the better for having you back, Sir.

[pause]

Jack:
Can we maybe drop the 'Sir' now? I mean, while I was away, I was thinking, maybe we could...You know, when this is all done...Dinner, a movie...?

Ianto:
...Are you asking me out on a date?

Jack:
Interested?

Ianto:
[stuttering] Well, as long as it's not in an office! Some fetishes should be kept to yourself.

Jack:
Looks like we're going to have to go through every drawer, bin and plant-pot.

Ianto:
Right, OK. I'll do this floor, don't want you getting over excited. You take the roof, you're good on roofs. [Pause. Jack starts to leave] Jack? Why are we helping him?

Jack:
He's a reminder of my past, I want him gone. [Beat] By the way, was that a yes?

Ianto:
Yes, yes...

Gwen:
You left us, Jack!

Jack:
[sigh] I know, I'm sorry.

Gwen:
We knew nothing, Jack!

Tosh:
Where were you?

Jack:
[smiles] I found my Doctor.

Owen:
Did he fix you?

Jack:
What's to fix? You don't mess with this level of perfection.

Ianto:
[softly] Are you going back to him?

Jack:
I came back for you. [to the rest of the team] For all of you.

Ianto:
'Just us. In this room. As long as it takes.' Terrifying.

Jack:
Really?

Ianto:
[nods] Absolutely. Shivers down my spine.

Jack:
You don't look scared.

Ianto:
Well, it passed.

[Jack growls in mock frustration]

Tosh:
You said we weren't allowed to use that again.

Jack:
It's just a mind probe.

Ianto:
Remember what happened last time you used it?

Jack:
That was different. And that species has extremely high blood pressure.

Ianto:
Oh, right, their heads must explode all the time.

[Gwen looks up, wide-eyed in shock]

Gwen:
Jack, you can't do this. What if you're wrong? If she is human, it'll kill her.

Jack:
I'm not wrong. We have to find out what she is.

Tosh:
Take it easy, Jack. Stop at the first sign of trouble.

Ianto:
Or at the first sign of exploding.

Beth:
Will it hurt?

Jack:
Yeah.

Beth:
Your bedside manners are rubbish.

Gwen:
You should see his manners in bed. They're atrocious, apparently...so I've heard.

Ianto:
Oh, they are. I remember this one time...

[Jack clears his throat]

Tosh:
No, I can't "just hook something up"! The entire telephone network is down!

Owen:
What about a mobile connection?

Tosh:
[annoyed] The entire. Telephone. Network. Is down!

Ianto:
Mobiles, landlines, tin cans with bits of string - everything, absolutely everything! No phones, phones all broken. [mimics telephone] Hello? Anyone there? [normal] No, 'cause the phones aren't working!

Tosh:
Please tell me you can stop this.

Jack:
Working as fast as we can. If we don't, we're all at the centre of the blast radius- we won't feel a thing.

Tosh:
[sullenly] That's comforting.

Jack:
Come on! Have a little faith, with a dashing hero like me on the case, how can we fail?

[silence]

Ianto:
...He is dashing, you have to give him that.

Owen:
And what if they can't stop it?

Tosh:
They'll stop it.

Owen:
Yeah, but if they can't?

Ianto:
Then it's...all over.

[pause]

Owen:
Let's all have sex.

Ianto:
[deadpan] And I thought the end of the world couldn't get any worse.

Gwen:
[about Tommy] He's a frozen soldier from 1918.

Jack:
Nobody's perfect.

Tosh:
What do you want to do?

Tommy:
Well... We could go back to mine, but there's only room for one and it's bloody freezing. [they both laugh]

Owen:
[about Tommy] You've fallen for him, haven't you?

Tosh:
I can be myself around him. I don't have to pretend.

Owen:
No, I understand. I didn't think you would have a weird fetish for defrosted men. [both laugh] I just...don't want you to get hurt, that's all.

Jack:
[draws a line on a piece of paper] Linear time. [balls the piece of paper up] Screwed up time. Imagine your life is a straight line, from birth to death. Now, try drawing that line on the paper without flattening it out.

Gwen:
It's impossible.

Jack:
That's why we gotta stop it.

Jack:
This time tomorrow he'll be back in 1918.

Ianto:
In his own time. [pause] Would you go back to yours, if you could?

Jack:
Why? Would you miss me?

Ianto:
Yep.

Jack:
...I left home a long time ago. Don't know where I really belong...Maybe that doesn't matter any more.

Ianto:
[perches on the edge of Jack's desk] I...know you get lonely.

Jack:
Going home wouldn't fix that. Being here, I've seen things I never dreamt I'd see...loved people I never would have known, if I'd just stayed where I was. [looks directly at Ianto] And I wouldn't change that for the world.

[Ianto stares at Jack for moment, then kisses him]

Gwen:
Have you ever eaten alien meat?

Jack:
Yeah.

Gwen:
What was it like?

Jack:
Well, he seemed to enjoy it.

Gwen:
Rhys... The things I have seen... The times I have wanted to tell you...

Rhys:
[half-disbelieving] ...Aliens? In Cardiff?!

Gwen:
Have you never seen something so mad, so extraordinary... That just for one second, you think there might be more out there?

Rhys:
Prove it.

Owen:
So the protein chains are regenerating, despite the mutilations. So not only is it replenishing its own flesh, but it's increasing it, giving them a brand new meat supply.

Gwen:
It would last them for years, then.

Tosh:
If we understood how worked, we could feed the world!

Ianto:
[deadpan] We could release a single.

Rhys:
Well, if you stopped and asked me exactly what I saw in there instead of showin' off round the place-

Jack:
[aside, to Ianto] Do I show off?

Ianto:
Just a bit.

Rhys:
-You'd know that I got out by telling them I wanted a job as a delivery boy! So rather than "cock things up", I found you a way to get in! But if you can't handle that, big boy, then you can stuff it!

[Beat]

Jack:
This is quite homoerotic.

Rhys:
You can hide in the back of the truck-

Gwen:
What is this, Scooby-Doo?! Absolutely not!

[Owen has just given Tosh a toy rodent]

Tosh:
Just what I need, a rodent watching me while I work. I think I'll call it Owen.

Adam:
You always remember what you kill, don't you, Jack?

[team discusses the mysterious box]

Ianto:
I think Jack brought that in.

Tosh:
No, I'm pretty sure Adam found it on an excavation a few months back.

Ianto:
I'll have a look in the diary. I like to log the interesting stuff.

Tosh:
You write about artifacts in your diary?

Ianto:
Among other things. [winks]

Jack:
Now I have to help you all go back. Find a memory that defines you, rediscover who you are. If I'm wrong, he will still be here when we've done this. [turns off computer screen] Let me take you back to before we all met. [turns off lights] Feel around for anything that makes you what you are. The hidden and the forgotten. Tell me where you are.

Gwen:
College canteen. Rhys is sitting opposite me telling stupid jokes.

[Flashback]

Rhys:
Where do you find a tortoise with no legs? Where you left it!

[Present]

Owen:
It's my birthday, ten. My mum spends the whole day screaming, 'I love you because you're my son but that doesn't mean I have to like you.'

Tosh:
Maths club. There's something so reliable about maths. Always the right answer.

Ianto:
Meeting Lisa. Falling in love. I never felt so alive.

Owen:
Turned sixteen, she packs my bags. That is the nicest thing you've done for me in years mother.

Gwen:
Kissing in the supermarket. The look on his face.

Tosh:
My first flat. I don't have a flat warming - there's no one I want to invite.

Ianto:
Losing Lisa. Like the world had ended.

Gwen:
The way he looks at me sometimes, as if he's scared of what he feels for me. I love him [turns to Jack] but not in the way I love you.

Jack:
[to Gwen] Take this [Gwen takes the retcon pill]

Tosh:
Knowing there has to be more to life than this, knowing I'm special, waiting for someone to see it.

Jack:
I saw it [gives her a pill]

Owen:
You save one life, a hundred lives but it's never enough. Who will save me?

Jack:
I will [gives him a pill]

Ianto:
Coming here, it gave me meaning again. [Turns to Jack] You. [Jack kisses his forehead then gives him a pill]

Jack:
[to everyone] You each have a short-term amnesia pill. It will make you forget Adam. We have to wipe out the last 48 hours from our memories. Go back to who we were.

[Ianto, Gwen and Owen take their pills]

Tosh:
[Switches the screen on to look at Adam in his cell] I'm going to lose so much.

Jack:
None of it was real.

Tosh:
He loved me and I loved him. It's no different from real memories.

Jack:
He forced it on you. You have to let it go

Tosh:
[Takes her pill, then looks at the screen] Goodbye Adam.

Jack:
Found your diary.

Ianto:
Yep, been looking for that. [starts to walk away]

Jack:
And for the record? [Ianto freezes] Measuring tapes never lie.

Ianto:
[quietly] F***.

Owen:
So, you and Jack go back a long way?

Martha:
Forward and back, really.

Owen:
What brought you together?

Martha:
Let's just say...we were under the same Doctor.

Jack:
I'd rely on Martha if the world was ending. In fact...I did.

Martha:
Jack's right. These attacks are not random. They're clinical, professional. More like assassinations.

Gwen:
Except Barry Leonard was a student. Who'd assassinate a student?

Martha:
Student loans company?

Gwen:
Yeah, I think you just cracked it.

[They both laugh.]

Martha:
So, Jack asked me if I could get you a UNIT cap to wear.

Ianto:
[surprised] Did he? Well, red is my colour.

Martha:
So, am I right in thinking that you and he...

Ianto:
We... dabble.

Martha:
Yeah?

Ianto:
Yeah.

Martha:
So...what's his "dabbling" like?

Ianto:
...Innovative.

Martha:
Really!

Ianto:
Bordering on the avant-garde.

Martha:
Wow!

Ianto:
Oh yeah... [stares into space] Huh... [snaps out of it] So, should we get your cover story sorted?

Martha:
[delighted] Absolutely!

Tosh:
Ianto, what have you done with Billy Davis's body?

Ianto:
Um, I was just about to dispose of it, why?

Tosh:
I thought of a way we can use him to get us into the Pharm. [shows something on screen, smiling] Clever, huh?

Ianto:
[gapes] Oh, you are warped on the inside. How do you think of these things?

Tosh:
[pleased] I'll take that as a compliment.

Owen:
[supposedly telling Martha what death is like] There was a light, a tiny speck of light and I was rushing towards it, like down a corridor, and it got brighter, and brighter, then suddenly there were these gates... these big, pearly gates and there was this old geezer and he said, "You've been a very naughty boy!"

Jack:
"Only in suffering do we recognise beauty."

Owen:
Yeah, yeah. Who said that?

Jack:
Proust.

Owen:
You've read Proust?

Jack:
Yeah. [pause] Well, no. We dated for a while. He was really immature.

Owen:
You know, none of us know whether to take you seriously when you say those things. [chuckles]

Jack:
[seriously] When you've lived as long as I have, you don't make any more up.

Jack:
...But then, forever's overrated.

Owen:
Not from where I'm sitting.

Jack:
If you've got forever, you don't notice the flecks in the concrete, or bother to touch the bricks... You send your friends into danger, knowing the stakes aren't the same for you, that you might get them killed - while you walk away unscathed.

Ianto:
I have searched for the phrase "I shall walk the Earth and my hunger shall know no bounds," but I keep getting redirected to Weight Watchers

Owen:
[talking to a child cancer patient] Jamie, you're scared, of course you are, the last lot of chemo didn't work and you can't bear the thought of going through all that pain again, I understand that mate, I really do. But let me tell you, that not everyone dies from this disease. And the ones with the best chance of making it are the ones who believe they can beat death. And sometimes, just sometimes, you can. So watch and learn, Jamie Burton.

Jamie:
Watch what?

Owen:
Watch me beat Death.

Tosh:
[finally picking the lock on a door] Come on!

Owen:
Okay, go, come on, Jamie, [to Tosh] take him!

Tosh:
Owen? I am not leaving you to face that thing on your own!

Owen:
I know what to do.

Tosh:
We don't know what we're dealing with!

Owen:
Tosh... [kisses Tosh] you're so going to hate me for this. [uses the lock-picking device to shut himself in the lobby]

Tosh:
Owen, no, open the door! What the hell are you doing? Owen!

Owen:
: [to Death] How long!? How long can you last here with only twelve victims? There's nothing here for you! Owen Harper's soul has left the building! There's nobody here but us dead men. [starts fighting Death to the protestations of his team] What else have you got? What else do you do to the dead? Is that all you've got? Is it?! [Death eventually fades away in a white light]

Owen:
[Opening narration] My name is Doctor Owen Harper, and this is my life. A life that is full of action. And violence. And work and wonder. Secrets. And sex. And love. And heartbreak. Death. My death. The death I survived. The death I'm now living through. Except.... this isn't living. Every day is the same. I get up. Get ready for work. Same as everyone else. The thing is, I'm not the same. I get to work and everyone is doing the same old thing. Babbling away about aliens, weddings. I'm not real. Three days ago I died. And they think I'm fine. But they're wrong.

Owen:
Yeah, I was brought back. Like Jesus really, but without the beard, you know. Shit, I'm never gonna have a beard. Not that I wanted one, you understand, but you know, one day I...

Maggie:
Okay, you're dead, and clearly that's a bit shit, and I'm sorry and everything, but if, if you are dead, then why are you here? You can't be wanting to jump, you can't die twice!

Owen:
Sorry, are you an expert?

Maggie:
Sorry, are you an idiot?

Owen:
Yeah, I'm a dead idiot.

Ianto:
You okay?

Owen:
[snidely] What do you think? I bet you're loving this, aren't you? It's like you've finally won.

Ianto:
I didn't realize we were in a competition.

Owen:
Oh, come on! Even Tosh had more of a life than you used to. And now you're always out on missions, you're shagging Jack, and I'm stuck here making the coffee!

Ianto:
[defensively] It's not like that. Me and Jack.

Owen:
Yeah, yeah... You and Jack. Gwen's getting married, Martha's got her bloke - God, even Tosh had Tommy! This really is shit!

Ianto:
We've all gone through shit. I've seen you dissect alien corpses, I've seen you save so many lives...are you really going to let this beat you?

Martha:
There is no sign of any muscle decay. You're in great shape, as ever.

Owen:
No use coming onto me, Jones. I'm a changed man.

Martha:
And no stiffening anywhere?

Owen:
Well...

Martha:
Just answer the question.

Owen:
Nothing to be scared of, is there?

Ianto:
Unlike, say...Tintin?

Owen:
[uncomfortable pause] Okay, I never liked Tintin. [everyone smirks] What? He's weird! Funny face. And his hair is just... it's horible.

Ianto:
I always loved Tintin.

Owen:
Yeah, well you would, wouldn't you? And he never had a girlfriend, did he? Just the dog, so I reckon he was actually shagging the dog. [give a grin. Ianto looks at him in disgust]

Gwen:
Okay, meanwhile, back at Torchwood...

Gwen:
We're not postponing the wedding. No way.

Rhys:
Forget the money, I want you where they can look after you, right? Getting married today doesn't matter.

Gwen:
It matters to me!! It's not about the money, Rhys. I want to marry you! Today. Whatever happens. If the skies suddenly fills full of spaceships, or an army of Weevils climbs out of the drains on St. Mary's Street, you fool! Do you not understand what I'm saying, Rhys Williams? All I want to do today is marry you. That's all I want to do.

Jack:
[pointing gun at Brenda] Get back, you ugly bitch!

Rhys:
What are you doing, that's my mother!

Jack:
No! It's the alien!

Brenda Williams:
I'm not an alien!

Jack:
Oh, you're good, I'll give you that.

Brenda Williams:
But I'm not!

Jack:
Yeah, and the Lone Ranger didn't have a thing with Tonto.

Jack:
What is it with you? Ever since Owen died, all you've done is agree with him!

Ianto:
I was brought up not to speak ill of the dead. Even if they do still do most of their talking for themselves.

Gwen:
What will you do while I'm gone?

Jack:
Ooh, the usual. Pizza. Ianto. [they laugh] Save the world a couple of times.

Ianto:
That's what I love about Torchwood. By day, you're chasing the scum of the universe, come midnight you're the wedding fairy.

[as Gwen and Owen are leaving the Electro]

Ianto:
Wait!

Gwen:
What?

Ianto:
[frowning] I just saw Jack.

Gwen:
[surprised] Where?

Ianto:
In the film!

[seeing Jack in an old film footage of a travelling show]

Owen:
That is you! Right, now I've seen everything.

Ianto:
[smugly] Told you so.

Gwen:
You did stand-up?

Jack:
I never did stand-up.

Gwen:
Alright... [fake American drawl] A song and dance.

Jack:
I was sensational!

Tosh:
I don't believe this, Jack, what were you doing there?

Owen:
He's part of this freak show.

Jack:
Ha, some things never change.

Owen:
You being rude about me?

Jack:
Ianto, with me. I need your local knowledge.

Gwen:
Oh, is that what you're calling it these days?

Christina:
Your eyes are older than your face.

Jack:
Is that a bad thing?

Christina:
Yes. It means you don't belong. It means you're from nowhere.

Gwen:
Torchwood doesn't do maternity leave - "Sorry Jack, I'd love to deal with those aliens but I can't find a babysitter", "No, no, no, I'll sort out that bomb once I've dropped Rhys Jr. off at nursery."

Gwen:
Do you think I've changed?

Rhys:
Eh?

Gwen:
Since I joined Torchwood, am I different?

Rhys:
Why?

Gwen:
It's just something Andy said. Okay, let me just tell you this one thing, okay?

Rhys:
Okay, go on.

Gwen:
He still fancies me. [Rhys snickers] Don't laugh, Rhys. That's why he didn't come to the wedding.

Rhys:
Bloody hell, poor sod.

Gwen:
Oi! I'm a very sexy lady and you are a very lucky man. Just remember that, okay? [unzips jacket]

Rhys:
We're not going to talk about kids tonight, are we?

Gwen:
We could so some practising.

Rhys:
You save this city. Well done. You save the world. Whatever. What for?

Gwen:
Sorry?

Rhys:
Why are you doing it? What are you trying to protect? What are you fighting for?

Gwen:
Because if I don't...

Rhys:
Shut up, I'm talking now, right? You do it so people can live their lives. And there's nothing more important than that. Falling in love, getting married, buying flats, having kids or not. But real life, that's what you're protecting. And if you're starting to think that your shit is more important than real life, then we're not going to last very long here, love.

[After walking in on Jack and Ianto in the hot house]

Gwen:
Ianto, hi. I'm sorry. I didn't realize-

Ianto:
Doesn't matter.

Gwen:
I wouldn't have come in if I'd known-

Jack:
Always room for one more. We could have used you an hour ago for naked hide-and-seek.

Ianto:
He cheats. He always cheats.

Andy:
Listen, I was going to ask...promise me you won't laugh. Have you got any vacancy's coming up? You know, with Torchwood? I was thinking, I'm great to work with...You know, tip 'em the wink?

Gwen:
[hesitantly] Maybe, yeah.

Jack:
Hey, when you joked about the Millennium Bug, I didn't realise it was gonna have 18 legs stacked with poison. Anyone home? Hey! You know you're supposed to party like it's... [stops and sees his dead crew, then a man] Alex?

Alex:
Jack! Just in time.

Jack:
Alex? What happened? Who did this?

Alex:
Me.

Jack:
What? Why?

Alex:
We got it wrong, Jack. We thought we could control the stuff we found. And what's it brought us? So much death.

Jack:
What happened to them?

Alex:
It's good you're here. Always did have great timing. This place, it's yours. Torchwood Three. My gift to you, Jack, for a century of service as field operative. Fill this place with purpose. Before it's too late. Please.

Jack:
Alex, listen. It's going to be okay.

Alex:
No. It's not. It's really not. I looked inside. It showed me what's coming. They were mercy killings. It's the kindest thing I could do. So none of us see the storm. I'm sorry I can't do the same for you. 21st century, Jack. Everything's gonna change. And we're not ready. [points gun to forehead]

Jack:
Alex! [gets splattered with blood]

Jack:
[irritated] Okay, this has to stop!

Ianto:
No, listen to me-

Jack:
I don't have time for this! Look, I don't care what your problem is, I want you out of this city by sunrise! There is no place for you here! Go back to London, and find another life! Keep stalking me, and I'll wipe your memory!

Ianto:
No, but the thing is-

Jack:
Look, any conversation between us, no matter what the subject, is over, finished, done, forever! I'm getting back behind the wheel of that car; If you're still standing in the road, I'm gonna drive thorough you! [walks away]

Ianto:
So you're not gonna help me catch this pterodactyl, then? [Jack turns around]

[talking about the pterodactyl]

Jack:
How'd you find it?

Ianto:
Rift activity locator.

Jack:
Torchwood London.

Ianto:
See? Quality kit.

Jack:
It's quite excitable!

Ianto:
Must be your aftershave.

Jack:
I never wear any.

Ianto:
[surprised] You smell like that naturally?

Jack:
Fifty first century pheromones!

Ianto:
Huh.

Jack:
You people have no idea! Up for another go?

Ianto:
I'm game if you are!

Owen:
If you're not a figment of my imagination, then I don't know what's happening anymore. Maybe this is what a mental breakdown feels like.

Jack:
You're fine. It's the rest of the world that's delusional.

John:
Here's what's going to happen: everything you love, everything you treasure, will die. I'm gonna tear your world apart, Captain Jack Harkness, piece by piece. Starting now.

[Jack enters the Hub. "I Lost My Heart to a Starship Trooper" is playing in the background.]

John:
Come on! Sing along! It's our song!

Jack:
We don't have a song! And if we did have a song, it wouldn't be this song!

John:
[deadpan] You're no fun!

Jack:
What do you want?

John:
I want you to know that I love you.

Jack:
Funny way of showing it.

John:
No, seriously. You have to understand. [turns around] I really do love you. [pulls out two submachine guns and shoots Jack repeatedly. John stands over his "corpse".] 'Cause this is gonna get nasty.

John:
You took your time!

Gwen:
On your knees!

John:
[sigh] Honestly, it's just sex, sex, sex, with you people!

Gwen:
Now!

[Owen is trapped in a room and is about to be vaporised]

Owen:
[hysterical] Tosh! Toshiko, I can't get out! Not like this! I'm not dying here! Get me out of here Tosh, get me out of here, I died once and I'm not doing it again! Where's Jack? Where's Gwen, Ianto, John?!? You wanna watch the dead man die again?!

Tosh:
Owen, just stay calm.

Owen:
Why should I do that? Where's the fun in that? I'm gonna rage my way to oblivion!

Tosh:
[upset, quietly] Please stop.

Owen:
Why? Give me good bloody reason why I should, one good reason why I shouldn't keep screaming!

Tosh:
[crying] Because you're breaking my heart!

Owen:
[calms down] Sorry.

Tosh:
[still crying, harder] It's my fault.

Owen:
No, no no it isn't, no it isn't, don't you dare go there Tosh, I'm really sorry. [pause] What's gonna happen to me, Tosh?

Tosh:
[whisper] I can't.

Owen:
Please, okay, I need to know.

Tosh:
[not crying but barely able to get the words out] The containment chamber will be flooded with irradiated coolant.

Owen:
Ah, my body will slowly decompose, while I watch.

Tosh:
[crying] I should have been able to stop it!

Owen:
Sshh, come on Tosh, there's no way you could have anticipated that power spike, come on. Besides you've saved my back so many times in the past, right from the moment I joined.

Tosh:
Your second week, I had to cover for you, pretend I was a medic because you were hung over and unreachable.

Owen:
[weak laugh] What was it, space pig?

Tosh:
Space pig.

Owen:
We never did get that date did we, you and me? We sort of, uh, missed each other. Was my fault, didn't notice until it was too late, I'm sorry.

Tosh:
[weakly, crying] Me too.

Owen:
[alarms sound] It's starting.

Tosh:
[whisper] Owen.

Owen:
It's all right; really Tosh, it's all right. [last words] Oh god.

Tosh:
[on video] Okay. So, if you're seeing this, I guess it means I'm, well, dead. Hope it was impressive! Not crossing the road or an 'incident' with a toaster. I just wanted to say, it's okay, it really is. Jack, you saved me. You showed me all the wonders of the universe and all those possibilities. And I wouldn't have missed it for the world. Thank you. And Owen. You never knew. I love you. All of you. And.... I hope I did good.

Jack:
Now we carry on.

Gwen:
I don't think I can. Not after this.

Jack:
You can. We all can. The end is where we start from.